Ninja Illusion: Not Taught in Tokyo
by nanny2000000
Summary: NarutoShaman King crossoverrnOkay, so we all know never to get dragged into mysterious, glowing portals, right? RIGHT? Okay, Naruto didn't learn soon enough...
1. When The Problems Began

A/N: This is my first time ever making a fan-fic! I'm so excited!! -- insert happy-go-lucky smile here -- So, please, when you reveiw...be harsh. I'd like to know if I'm doing anything wrong. Flames (GENTLE criticism, not make-you-cry insults) are somewhat welcome. This A/N was somewhat copied from someone I know. Why did I copy it? I want to be as good as her at writing, and her A/Ns are funny.

Anyway R&R (read and reveiw), then go get some R&R (rest and relaxation).

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Chapter One

Naruto looked carefully into the portal. The creepy ninja-dude had jumped in, but...

"Naruto, you bonehead! Get away before that thing pulls you in!" Sakura shouted.

"But ninja-guy went in here!" Naruto protested.

"Naruto, I really don't think it's a good idea to - " Sasuke started.

"Get back here **DUNCE**!" Kakashi ordered. When he saw Naruto had no intention of obeying, he slapped his forehead.

Suddenly, a hand reached out of the portal. "Get in here, orange jacket! Our fight isn't finished yet!"

Naruto felt himself pulled backwards. "What the - "

"Aaaaahhhhh!"

"Naruto!"

"You stupid - "

Before long, Naruto found himself in a swirling void. The ninja they had been battling earlier glared at Naruto. He practically seethed hatred. "You little brat..."

"I'm no brat," Naruto roared. "I'm a ninja!!!" he pulled some shuriken from his belt, threw them...and suddenly, everything turned blood-red...the world around him seemed to fade into a vividly real crimson, then turn to black...

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"Yoh! Get over here!!"

"Huh? Who's this nut job?"

"I have no idea. Must be a cosplayer..."

"There's a comic convention around here?"

"Look at the sign, Yoh..."

Naruto's eyes slowly opened. He looked up to see a short, large-headed boy with ruffled brown-blonde hair. His clothes were rather mature and sensible, especially for Konohakagure. What was he, some Ninja Registration Official? Kind of short...and he was just a kid!

Then there was the tall boy with dark brown hair. He wore a white button-up shirt, but it had been left open. He had on a necklace, on which was strung a set of bear claws (not the donut, the actual claw). He wore black jeans which he had rolled to his knees, and had on typical sandals.

Naruto sat up, groaning. "Where am I?"

"Whoa, buddy," the short one said. "Have you been drinking?"

"No...master Kakashi won't let me."

"Kakashi?"

"Yeah...have you seen him?"

The tall boy laughed. "Nope. Look, my name's Yoh Asakura, and this here's Manta Oyamada."

"Yoh and Manta? Can you tell me where I am?"

"You're in Tokyo, buddy!"

"Tokyo?" Naruto questioned. Suddenly, he noticed the buildings around him. Why did everything seem so...different? Why did it seem like...

...he was in the future?

"AAAAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!"

"Heheheh...must've saw Anna's face," Manta whispered to Yoh.

"Hey, Manta were you two talking about _me_ behind my back?" Anna asked in a dark evil tone.

"Why, yes we were talking about how fashionable you are..." Manta said in a very nervous tone.

"Liar," Anna said right after stringing him up with her beads so that she could drag him away and torture him for a little while.

"YOH! SAVE ME! YYYOOOHHHH!!!" Manta screamed in despair.

"Who's the nutcase gir-" Naruto began.

"HEY! Do you want the same torture...I-I-I mean training as him?" Yoh questioned. He blinked a couple times. "So...are you lost or something?"

"Yeah, no w-wait uhhh...I don't know, umm tell me where the portal is, now!"

Yoh and the others - including Naruto - all headed back to the house so that they could talk understand what's going on, get to know each other a little better...but Naruto hadn't met Amidamaru...ah, well he'd meet him sooner or later.

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The next morning Naruto woke up to see Yoh playing GameBoy Advanced.

"WWOOWWW! What's that?" Naruto asked very inquisitively.

"Well, this is called a GameBoy Advanced and right now I am playing Mario World 3," after that Yoh just did his best to explain the objectives and things. Naruto peered at the gadget in frustration. Yoh sighed. "You...don't get it, do you? Fine, jump on the bad guy's heads and you press B when you have a flower."

"Why would I want some dumb flower?" Naruto questioned. "Do I look like some girly-girl?"

Yoh laughed. "No, on the game they let you shoot fire balls."

"Cool! Show me the flower shop!" Naruto ordered.

"HAHAHAH! No, you have to hit the bottom of those boxes by jumping!" Yoh chuckled. "How about you just get yourself some breakfast."

"Ooh...DO YOU HAVE RAMEN???!!!" Naruto asked very eagerly.

"Um, well that's for lunch. We have Pop Tarts," Yoh said.

"Well, I'll give them a try," Naruto answered. He shuffled over to the kitchen and stared in shock as a small brownish rectangle pooped out of a black box. "Aaaahhhh! It's attacking me!" he hollered.

"Hey, not so loud! You might wake Anna up!" Yoh said in a loud whisper.

Naruto blinked. "So..?"

"Observe. The brown rectangle here..." Yoh split it in half and munched one part. "...is food."

Naruto took the other half and bit some off. His eyes widened. "THESE ARE GREAT!!! Do you have RAMEN flavored?"

"I told you, keep it dow - "

Just then Anna slammed open the door and smashed Naruto into the wall.

"Who just asked if they wanted to die!?" Anna yelled.

Just then Manta walked out and she 'accidentally' stomped him into the ground.

"Best not have been you again shrimp," Anna said in a convinced sort of voice. "Okay I have decided...MANTA!!!"

"NO! It wasn't me I just woke up! My door is right across from yours so..." Manta continued to try and stop himself from tortures.

Meanwhile...

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'What the heck have you gotten yourself into this time, dunce?' Sasuke asked in his mind.

"Even thought I really hate him I hope he's okay," Sakura said suddenly.

"As do we all!" Kakashi added.

They walked on, but soon stopped upon finding a towering man with blonde hair and dark circles beneath his tired eyes. His lips were a harrowing shade of death-blue. They never noticed he had a dog behind him.

"Have you seen a short kid with a funny looking face?" Kakashi asked him.

"Hmm? Oh you mean Manta?" the man asked, turning around.

"Who are - " the man stopped and scratched the back of his head, smiling politely. "Wait, I'm sorry...it is rude not to give one's own name first. I am Faust VIII, at your service."

Sakura smiled...then she saw his dog. Her eyes went wide with horror...or perhaps disgust. It was nothing more than a skeleton frame, though at one time it must have been a very big _living_ dog. "EEEEEEK!!! Get it away from me!!!"

"Don't worry...she's just a big chicken. It's not your fault. That's quite an interesting pet you have," Sasuke said in a surprised tone. He wasn't scared by the undead creature, he was fascinated by it. He reached out a hand to stroke the bones that made up the creature's shaky frame...

Kakashi stared for a moment, then went back to more important matters. "Mister...um, Faust. Have you seen a short, funny looking kid with an orange jacket?" Kakashi asked.

"Well, I've never seen Manta wear an orange jacket..."

"His name's not Manta, it's Naruto."

"In that case, no," Faust replied, bowing his head in apology.

"CRAP! Naruto, you dick, what've you gotten into this time?" Sasuke growled.

Kakashi held his forehead in his hand. "I should have expected it. This is a big city, and there's a lot of people...I'm sorry to be so impulsive, but we _are_ worried about him."

"Not at all," Faust said, waving the matter away. He noticed his dog's odd behavior around Sasuke. The poor creature seemed afraid of him. "Come here, Frankensteiny."

"Well...I hate to ask it of you...but could you please help us find our stupid friend?" Kakashi asked.

"I'm sorry, but right now I'm looking for someone myself. His name is Yoh Asakura. Rather short...um, actually, that's compared to me. He's about as tall as that dark-haired companion of yours. He has deep brown hair, and his headphones seem permanently attached to his ears, I have to thank him for something he helped with on my leg. Have you seen him?" Faust questioned.

"Ask the brain," Sasuke grumbled, pointing at Sakura.

"Ummmm...no, that name does not come to mind," Sakura said.

"Well, good luck with your search!" Kakashi said.

"You too!" Faust replied.

They walked about two miles asking, "Have you seen Naruto?" to everyone they crossed. They even did their best to explain what he looked like, his personality, everything...but no one had a clue.

Kakashi looked back to Sakura to ask her a question, but he suddenly stopped. He'd just received quite a shock...Sakura's shirt had wet spots here and there. She had been crying for a while. Sasuke noticed his sensei's face, and when he looked back, he was startled, too.

"Uh...hey, Sakura. W-why are you c-c-crying?" Sasuke asked, starting to feel sad too.

"B-b-b-because!" she choked. "Well I...I have only ever liked five people in my life. Those people were my brother, some kid, and you three. You see, my brother was really nice to me, and my parents neglected me. My brother could do anything that my parents wanted, and because I was so clumsy they never even let me see a knife. While peeling an apple for my mom, my brother slipped and cut his thumb halfway off. They never even thought of it as clumsiness...they just saw the agony he was going through. After that my brother was suffering...so no one even thought I was important. The only one that even talked to me was some kid whose name began with 'n'...and...he looked a lot like Naruto. He always sat on his favorite swing in the village...I really liked him...in fact I liked him _that_ way...well...you know what I mean. It was crazy...I liked him even more than I like Sasuke. But then we just lost contact with each other. I've lost everyone I love in this world..." She realized that didn't quite fit. "I mean the other world. Our world. But anyway, enough with my sob story. Let's try and find Naruto!" Sakura finished, wiping away her tears.

"Finally!" Sasuke said under his breath. "LET'S GO!!!" Sasuke suddenly blurted out...quite loudly...

"Yeah," Kakashi grunted, trying to regain his hearing.

They walked on through the graveyard just in case he was in there. Suddenly they came across Yoh, completely forgetting Faust's description. Hardly willing to give up, they asked him the same question they asked everyone.

Yoh, being Yoh, completely forgot about Naruto.

"No, sorry," Yoh said apologetically.

"Thanks anyway..." Kakashi said sadly, walking away with Sakura and Sasuke.

Suddenly, Yoh remembered the off-beat boy who was living with him. He turned to call the three ninjas...but it was too late.

"Aw well, they'll find him sooner or later...waitaminnit...they seemed really desperate. Maybe...I should...aw, what the heck.. I'll go catch up and tell them," Yoh said to himself.

Yoh ran as fast as he could and finally caught up with them. "Hey! Hey, hey, wait up! You asked about the kid with the orange jacket! I'll take you to him!" Yoh gasped, leaning on his knees for support.

"Y-you know Naruto?!!" Sakura gasped.

"That's him! That's his name!"

"YES!" she shrieked, jumping up.

"Sakura, calm down," Kakashi chuckled.

"About time we learned where that bonehead shacked up," Sasuke grumbled good-naturedly.

They walked on to Yoh's home...and they saw Naruto swinging in a hammock.

"NARUTO!!!" Sakura screamed loud enough to wake the dead.

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Everyone had gone inside. They all sat around the table, and all eyes were fixed on Naruto. Yoh asked, "So, Naruto can you tell us a little about your childhood?"

"Well...it's kind of...painful," Naruto replied.

"Come on, dunce," Kakashi whispered through gritted teeth. "You're some lame freeloader who's been taking advantage of their hospitality. The least you could do is tell them about your past!"

"Fine...but don't say I didn't warn you," Naruto said reluctantly. He explained about the fox demon, about his dream to one day become Hokage, and all manner of things he remembered. Then...as low as he could be...the Ninja Centerfold!

He only got to the name of his diabolical ninja technique, and then Manta cocked his head to one side and asked, "Hey, can you show us the Ninja Centerfold?"

"Yeah! Even I haven't seen it," Sakura said.

Naruto looked around at the circle of people. His sensei, his best friends, and the people who had taken him in. Not a good combo of people to show them the Ninja Centerfold.

But he wasn't a prankster for no reason. "Well...if you honestly want me to!" he said. "But don't say I didn't warn you!"

"We can withstand any level of disgust!" Yoh said.

"NINJA CENTERFOLD!" Naruto said triumphantly.

Then he turned into the beautiful, naked girl, blew a kiss, then turned back.

"Well...um...that's it. Sorry..." Naruto said, embarrassed. His humiliation grew as he looked at the faces of the crowd. "No, really! I'm sorry!

"Okay, THAT exceeds the disgusting-limit!" Manta yelled.

"Compared to that I'm totally flat chested," Anna complained. "Perv."

Naruto was nearly positive they were going to beat him into a pulp... but without warning, Faust stormed into the living room. "YOH ASAKURA!!! I have come to thank you for that little fracture you set upon my leg!" he growled. "If you will...follow me to the graveyard!"

They walked outside, weaving their way towards the graveyard. They finally arrived, near a crowded area of street. "What's with all the people, Faust?" Yoh demanded.

"I want an audience when I kill you."

"That's just great. I'll beat you so bad, you'll -" Yoh started to approach, his eyes set with determination, but Naruto shoved him to one side. "Naruto, what the heck are you up to?" Yoh demanded.

"Leave this to me..." Naruto seethed. "..........and shield your eyes. I'll tell you when you can open them." He placed his hands together in the fabled sign and shouted loudly, "Ninja Centerfold!"

"Oh, no!" everyone except Naruto the (and the people who didn't know what it was) groaned.

Then...he changed.

"That's...that's even sicker than my zombies!" Faust said, disgusted.

"Now...I change back!" Naruto yelled.

Nothing happened.

"CHANGE BACK!!!" Naruto yelled louder. "DANGIT, CHANGE BACK! BACK! BAAAAACK!!!!!!"

At that instant Naruto's companions knew. Huh. Guess the first time, he was just lucky, eh? It had been ages since Naruto had done his technique. He was stuck...stuck as a beautiful, clothing-less girl.

Suddenly, a crowd of teenage boys gathered around Naruto.

"Ooooh..."

"Look at her!"

"You got guts, girl!"

"What a body!"

"A-A-A-A-AAAAAAHHHHHH! DISGUSTING!!!" Anna screamed.

"Uggh...Naruto couldn't you at least have put underwear on her?" Kakashi said.

"Well, what are you waiting for?! Get me some clothes, Yoh!" Naruto yapped, humiliated. "And stop staring at me, ya' perverts!!"

"Our house is three blocks away!" Yoh yelled back.

"At least cover their eyes!!!" Naruto begged.

"Watch out, all!" came a confident voice.

Everyone spun around to see a blue-haired boy with a monster-sized snowboard. A tiny, black-haired girl was perched on his shoulder. "How about you stop staring at my buddy's buddy and go the heck away!"

Yoh smiled. "Horo-Horo!"

Horo-Horo made quick work of knocking out all the boys with his snowboard. By then, all the others had left.

"Who are you?" Horo-Horo asked gazing at Naruto. "Yoh-kun, exactly what were you planning with this hottie here?" Naruto felt sick...he wished Horo-Horo hadn't said that.

It wasn't that his form hadn't been made to cause trouble. It was just that hearing a _boy_ call him a hottie wasn't exactly something he wanted...

"Tsk, tsk! You shouldn't gaze!" Yoh said.

"You...ack! You're a perv too!" Anna yelled. She then proceded to whack Horo-Horo on the head with a baseball bat.

Faust's annoyance, meanwhile, had been steadily growing. "Yes, well, anyway...I CAME TO FIGHT!!!" he yelled angrily.

"Jeez, will ya' wait a second?" Yoh snapped.

"I have been waiting...for 12 minutes and 27 seconds!" Faust said, checking his watch.

"Fine let's fight already! Let's-" Yoh started, but he was cut off.

"For shame. Attacking a man who is not prepared for battle. Have you no honor, Yoh Asakura?" Faust asked. A skeleton climbed it's way up from the ground, and Faust grinned wildly. He grabbed the arms, ripped them off, and wedged them into his own joint.

"Okay, why the heck did you just do that?" Yoh asked, sickened.

"Hahahahah...you seem to not understand. When I put on these arms I can reach two times the length I normally would. It goes against most every anatomical beleif, but through necromancy, it's possible. Besides, morphine eliminates the pain. Now I can reach you without you touching me!" Faust chuckled.

'Dang...he's right...I can't reach him with just a sword. And even without that, he's got his skeleton army,' Yoh thought bitterly.

Just then Anna grabbed the tallest skeleton in sight, ripped off his arms, and gave them to Yoh. "Well, as long as you're going to cheat like that...why don't you do that too, Yoh!"

"Maybe because I'm not doped up on pain killers like he is!!" Yoh replied.

"Gimme a break..." Anna sighed. "No, maybe I should give you one."

"Anna...be nice..."

"Here!" Anna said, moving towards his arms with a devilish look.

"In case you forgot, he does it because he's a necromancer! I can't!"

"Good point..." Anna said, frowning. "That is SO not fair."

Faust snorted. "Pathetic. Hey, Manta hasn't said too to think of it, where is he?" Faust asked.

"He's scared of you, idiot! You sliced him like a biology frog! He's at home," Yoh countered.

"Aha! So that's why he avoids me! All I wanted to do is investigate why he's so small...it's so cowardly of you, interfering with my scientific research!" Faust said nonchalantly. "Then again, both of you screamed like little girls..."

"Ex-CUSE me?!" Anna snarled. "Little girls?!!"

"Anna, leave it," Yoh snarled, glaring at Faust. "Listen, you...Manta has been my best...my only _living_ friend for a very, very long time! If you ever even say anything like that again, I WILL kill you," Yoh said angrily.

"Overreacting brat. Pests like you deserve to be punished, and I'll gladly deal your penalty!" Faust yelled, his eyes bright with the desire for vengance.

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Naruto had snuck away to get to Yoh's house. "Dangit, I am so lost...wait a minute! I recognize this building. Yoh's house isn't too far." S/he went around a fence. There was a sign, he couldn't read it.

It said 'Okunashi School for Boys.'

"Okay, I'll just sneak around the back of this place, count to five, and sprint like all crap to get to Yoh's house. All right. One...two...three...four...GO!" Naruto said to himself.

But at that moment...

"All right boys keep up and don't fall behind!" said the cute gym instructor, leading the gym class around their daily laps.

"All right, let's stay just a couple feet behind so that we can at least look at her butt!" some boys whispered to each other.

"You back there! Stop talking, and keep up!" she ordered.

"Yes Ms. Ochitaka!" one replied, his eyes fixed on her backside.

"Shut up, Tetsaru! Quit being such a goody-goody!" someone else yelled at him.

Just then, Naruto stumbled from the bushes, right onto the track. Right in front of a boy...who crashed into Naruto...and knocked him to the ground. And everyone stared in shock.

"I am in so much trouble..." Naruto whimpered.

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A/N: End of chapter one.

So, what does everyone think? In the next chapter,we meet someone who would actually fall for Naruto's lies ( How pathetic...).  
Here's a spoiler...a small one, but nevertheless a spoiler.

_"YES BUT I...I guess your right...I'm sorry. YEAH RIGHT! In all my life, I have never been so humiliated as to be beaten by some worthless BRAT!!!" Faust growled._

_"Pah-lease, I can do better than that. What a-"_

_"There you go again making me sound like some infant!" Faust complained._

_"As I said, what a fool..."_

_"Come on give up now idiot!" Sasuke and Naruto said in symmetry._

_"Come on, you couldn't beat Yoh even if ya' had a million years!" Naruto yelled._

_"He's right you big asshole!!!" Sasuke said._

Justwhat is Naruto going to do trapped in the Ninja Centerfold anyway (besides run around naked, trying to solve his problem)? Is Narutogoing to STAYa girl? What happened to Ms. Ochitaka, his possible rescuer (or maybe she's not...you'll see!) Find all this out in the next chapter.


	2. His Feminine Side

Chapter Two

"E-e-explain yourself n-now!" Ms. Ochitaka demanded, her voice dripping with disgust.

"Well, you see..." Naruto stammered nervously. "I was robbed of my clothes by perverts! They ran away so fast..." A lame lie, but maybe they'd take it...

"Robbed by perverts?! Such people should be put in jail! Did you get a good look at them?" she growled.

"No, they were wearing masks..."

"You poor girl! Don't worry!" Ms. Ochitaka sympathized with Naruto over the 'theft'.

"Wow! Look at that bod!" a boy breathed.

"That's even better than the teacher's!" Tetsaru whispered.

"Boys," Ms. Ochitaka said in quiet warning.

"Can you strike a pose?" one asked.

"Boys!" Ms. Ochitaka said louder.

"Can I get your phone number?" one pleaded.

"BOYS!!!" she yelled. She turned to Naruto. "Hey, you! Put on this baggy jacket! It should cover just about all of you...well, the bad parts, anyway. And you boys!! I'm ashamed of you! How could you be so cruel as to stare at this poor girl! You should be ashamed of yourselves!" Ms. Ochitaka scolded.

"Ms. Ochitaka, right? Thank you!" Naruto said.

"No problem!" Ms. Ochitaka said kindly.

"I wish I had a girlfriend as hot as that!" one said.

"EVERYONE!!! Did you forget what I just said?! Do not be such perverts!!!"

"But...she's just so hot!" one sighed.

"Everyone, class dismissed! Head to your second period classes!" Ms. Ochitaka commanded.

"Yes ma'am," they said in unison.

"By the way, what is your name? Do not worry if the boys hear," Ms. Ochitaka .

"Uh...Naruto," Naruto said.

"Let's all write it down!" the boys whispered, snatching up paper and pencils.

"The reason it sounds kind of strange is 'cause I'm from a very different place...in fact, it's nowhere near here," Naruto said. "Uhhh...can I borrow some clothes? Because... actually my family was on vacation, and only needed two or three changes of clothes. The robbers stole my whole backpack. So I really need some clothing." He sniffled in a most pathetic manner.

"Well...I have a some spare clothing. Come to my house! Follow me! If you go any other route, you will get caught!" Ms. Ochitaka advised.

"Oh thank you, thank you, thank you!" Naruto said while giving her a hug. Inside, he was grinning happily, staring at her all over...

"Well...let's go!" Ms. Ochitaka said.

They quickly - though stealthily - made their way to Ms. Ochitaka's house.

"Here...I have this shirt, pants, a skirt, and another shirt. Don't worry take them all! I have to clean up my closet anyway," Ms. Ochitaka said generously.

"Oh, I just can't thank you enough! If I hadn't run into you...then I'd have to go around..." Naruto gulped. "Naked," he finished, shivering.

"Here, try this on!" Ms. Ochitaka recommended.

Naruto changed clothing. "Hmmmm...maybe...I like it!" he said cheerily.

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'Crap. How am I going to reach him?' Yoh asked his head.

'Listen up you wimp! Your goin' to beat this guy no matter what he does!!!' Yoh's inside-the-head motivation said to him.

'Your right! I can do it!!!' Yoh thought. "I CAN DO IT!!!" he yelled.

"Yeah right! Not when I have my arms this long!" Faust laughed.

"Ha. There is something that you, too, have overlooked! If you take bones this old, they have been decaying for years! If you try to hit me, I'll hit your skeletal arms and they'll simply snap straight off!" Yoh said.

'AUGH! He's right! The bones I picked were random....these just happened to be thirty-two years old!' Faust thought sourly.

"Now, prepare yourself!!!" Yoh yelled.

Yoh had quite a bit of fun beating the shit out of Faust. Revenge was never a good idea, since it often backfired, and Yoh made it a point to prove that. Still, he made sure that he didn't break any of Faust's bones, because if he did, then he would have to do this quite a few times...Faust obviously had a thing for coming back for more.

"Ugh...I...I...I need a drink...my throat is almost completely dry!" Faust said.

"Heck, I thought you'd actually say something dramatic!" Anna said.

--- (A/N: "Umm...I guess we don't really matter that much." P eople looked at her, confused. "Well, no one has talked to us for the whole friggin' chapter!" Sakura said.

"Hmm...she's right! We haven't talked the whole...uh....friggin' chapter!'" Sasuke agreed.

"What's with 'friggin' alluva sudden?" Kakashi asked.

"I dunno," Yoh replied.

"Continue with the chapter!" Sasuke demanded.

"All righty!" the writer said. ) ---

"Yoh! Get me some water...please!" Faust pleaded.

"I'm gone! I'll go get some water!" Yoh lied, smiling wickedly.

"Fine, you go get water, and I'll go find Naruto with these other guys!" Anna said.

They left Faust lying there unable to go out and about.

"Um...I take it Yoh is going somewhere else instead of getting me water. Well then, I'll get my own water!" Faust said with determination in his voice.

He stood up...and he heard a sickening crack as his bone shifted. He narrowed his eyes in fury.

"Grr...Yoh Asakura I can't feel this...but you will when I give it back!"

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"So, Ms. Ochitaka, what's your favorite food?" Naruto asked.

"Hmm...that's a tough one...I'd have to say ramen!" she answered.

"WOW! ME TOO!!!" Naruto replied happily.

"We are so much alike...it's like we're twins!" Ms. Ochitaka said.

"Out of the selection you gave me, this is my favorite outfit! You have very good taste, I must say!" Naruto complimented.

"Why, that was my favorite outfit when I was a teenager!" Ms. Ochitaka laughed.

"We _are_ twins! Well...actually...I'm just guessing but it certainly sounds like it! Doncha' think?" Naruto chuckled.

"It certainly seems like it!" she replied. "Would you like some ramen with tiny bits of sushi in it?"

"Yes please!" Naruto replied.

"Coming up! You know, you are the first person that I have ever met that is so much like me! It's kind of shocking...meeting someone that is exactly like you. Yet I met you when you bumped into my student. And you were completely naked, because some jerks raped you. Strange, don't you say?" Ms. Ochitaka asked.

"No kidding!" Naruto replied. "Hey, you know that blue sign in front of the building? What does it say?" he asked.

"Okunashi School for Boys," she answered.

"Ack! No wonder there was only boys!"

"You could not read it?" she asked.

"No I'm not too good with this writing," Naruto replied.

"Ahh...so that is why you did not know. Wow...you did not study our language before you came?"

"No...my dad acts before he thinks," Naruto answered. 'Hmm...I wonder what my mom and dad were like...'

"Do you have friends? You must have some!" Ms. Ochitaka said.

"I have three. Sasuke, Sakura, and Kakashi. They're all back home," Naruto said.

"I could tell...they have very strange names!" she answered.

"Well, when you're from such an isolated place it kind of happens like that. Man, I'm really tired. I haven't slept in days," Naruto complained.

"Well...we have two beds...but they're in the same room. Well, since we are both girls I guess it's okay!" Ms. Ochitaka said.

'WHAT! I can NOT do that! Gyeeeh...it's impossible!' Naruto thought desperately. 'No, no, no, no, no, nononononoooooooooo!'

"Tonight, we can tell each other more about ourselves!" she said.

'AAAUUUGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!' Naruto thought.

"Ahh...I will learn more about you, and you will learn more about me! This will be great!" she said joyfully. "It'll be like a sleepover...I haven't had one since I was a kid!"

"Would you like to see something I am very good at? It's something I learned, but don't worry...it isn't dirty!"

"Well...I guess," Ms. Ochitaka said cheerfully.

"Doppelganger!" Naruto said.

"What is the Whatchamagagger?" Ms.Ochitaka questioned.

"This!" Naruto said.

"Wow...interesting...amazing...you made a perfect copy of yourself...even the clothes! Not a single mistake!" Ms. Ochitaka said in shock.

"Yeah, and I can keep it up for quite some time." Naruto stopped and yawned. "I'm getting really sleepy. Is the ramen done?" Naruto asked.

"Oh, I forgot to check!" she said, moving over to the stove. She proceeded to examine the meal, making comments every now and then. "Hmm...put this here...eww, take that out...hmmm...that's in the wrong bucket...hmm...okay set the timer for this...and we are ready to go!"

"Oh...I still can't thank you enough!"

"Actually I get lonely here all by myself. It makes me sad," Ms. Ochitaka said.

"Think we hum enough?" Naruto asked.

"What?"

"One of us is always going 'hmmm.'"

"Indeed."

Naruto smiled. Things were looking up...

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"I wonder...where is Naruto?" Anna wondered.

"Let's ask the principals of all the schools!" Yoh recommended.

"GAK! Where did you come from?" Kakashi asked. 'That's even better than me! He's amazing!' Kakashi thought.

"I had to get away from that situation. I made it sound like I was getting him some water," Yoh cruelly snickered.

"Let's go ask Akinashomo Elementary, and then Usaiashi Elementary."

"Let's go! The more time we talk, the less time we have left to help him!" Kakashi yelled.

"Sounds good!" Sakura said cheerfully.

"Why are you so cheerful?"

"Because now that Naruto may be a permanent girl if anyone sees him flirting with me, they'll all think he's a lesbian!" she chuckled.

"Ah...well, let's continue!"

"Yeah, you still want to find him don't you?" Yoh asked.

"Ummm...not really," Kakashi, Sasuke, Sakura replied in unison.

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"Mr. Yakumotsu, do you know of a woman with blonde hair, and her name's Naruto?"

"No, sorry," he replied.

They had went from school to school trying to find Naruto and...they finally came to the right school...

"Mr. Yakunoruza have you heard of this woman named Naruto?" Anna asked regaining her breathe from all that hustling around everywhere.

"Yes, the gym teacher said something about Nar-somthing," he tried to say.

"Naruto, okay? UTO! Not watchamacalla!"

"Grouchy punk kids..."

"Where does this gym techer live?" Anna asked. "You see, our friend snuck off without even telling us, so now we don't know where she is."

"Otubei Lane, 19362," He replied.

"Thanks!" Anna said.

"Hmph," he sort of replied.

They made their way to Ms. Ochitaka's house.

"19358...19360...19362! Finally! Now, don't be rude and don't do anything...dirty," Anna said suspiciously.

They knocked on the door, took a deep gulp...

"Is Naruto here?" Sakura asked.

"Why, yes. Yes, she is. Would you like to say hi?" Ms. Ochitaka asked.

"You see, we are looking for her," Kakashi explained.

"You must be her friends! Hm, are you also on vacation?" she asked.

"Ummm...you could say that," they replied, wondering why she asked.

"Let's ask Naruto! Maybe he can tell us why she asked us such a weird question," Sakura whispered as they walked in. The second Sakura set eyes on Naruto, she asked, "Can you come with me for a second?"

"Ummm...sure," Naruto answered suspiciously. He came with her outside. "All right, whaddya want? Money? Se - "

"No, no, no! I just want to ask...why did she think we came on vacation?"

"Oh, that? Yeah, I told her I came here on vacation," Naruto replied.

"A-and she believed you?" Sakura chortled. "What a sucker!"

Their sensei poked his head outside. "Will you be joining us any time soon? Because all of the snacks are just about all the way gone. You're probably going to miss all of them!" he said.

"Let's go, I don't wanna miss the snacks!"Naruto yapped.

"Pig!! Oink, oink!" Sakura countered.

"Yep, and I'm proud of it!"

"That is NOT something to be proud of ..." Sakura sighed.

They went inside, and slowly, Sakura circled around the room, quietly explaining why the strange question had been asked.

"So everyone how is my cooking?"

"Hrmf! Good!"

"Show your manners! If you have any," Kakashi oredered.

"Well she's right...it's good!" Sakura agreed.

"Yes indeed," Kakashi agreed with Sakura.

"This is the first time I cooked for guests," she nervously laughed.

"W-what? This is delicious!"

"This can't be your first time cooking for guests," Naruto said.

"Yes, actually it is," Ms. Ochitaka corrected. " Now we will have to rearrange the places where people sleep. Let us see...how will we do this? Naruto will sleep here...no, no, no...the boys won't sleep in the same room as us, and so...they will sleep in the super comfy chairs...and we will sleep in the beds!"

"But wait...there are only two beds! How will that work?" Naruto said praying he wouldn't sleep in the same room as the teacher.

"Push both of them together and make a queen sized bed," she smiled.

'NOOOOOONONONONONONONOOOHHHH!' Naruto thought.

"Feh. I've had to sleep in worse! This just isn't nearly as bad. Perhaps I might like sleeping in the comfy chair!" Sasuke said trying to think... 'How am I going to sleep?'

"Simple...get a pillow and quilt and put your head on the pillow," Ms. Ochitaka suggested.

"Ah, thank you," Sasuke answered. "How the heck how did you know that?"

"Ummm...heh...heh...ugh...all right the cat's out of the bag...I am a telepath," she replied.

"You mean you didn't tell us...because of what?" Kakashi asked.

"Well...I...I just get so embarrassed...I am very sorry," Ms. Ochitaka replied.

"You're...embarrassed?" Sakura stuttered.

"Yeah," she replied.

'What a wuss,' Sasuke thought.

"Because...it's really...my oversoul," she said as red as an apple.

"YOUR OVERSOUL???!!!" Yoh screamed. "YAAAGGGHHH!"

"Lower your decibal count...PLEASE!" Kakshi demanded.

"Yes, I have been looking for a boy named Yoh," Ms. Ochitaka pointed out.

"Oh, darn I forgot to feed my Japanese Fighting Fish!" Yoh nervously chuckled.

"Don't worry I told Manta to and he said 'okee-dokee' exactly like that, YOH!," Anna said squeezing Yoh's arm angrily.

"Leggo! You'll cut off the circulation!" Yoh barked.

"Huh? You are Yoh?" Ms. Ochitaka away in the middle of our fight...why I ought to rip off his headphones, scream in his ear and see how badly I damaged them!"

On he walked, asking tons of people, "Have you seen this boy?"

None responded in the positive.

"If I were the kommandant of a prison camp I'd make him sleep in ice water while I pull out his toenails!" Faust grumbled.

"Hey, mumsy! Why is that man talking to himself? He's crazy isn't he, mumsy?" a little boy asked his mom.

"I'M NOT CRAZY YOU LITTLE BRAT!"

"Sniffle...WWAAAAAAHHHH! THE BIG MAN YELLED AT ME! WAHHH!"

"No, no, no! I'm sorry!" Faust said.

"WAAH-h-huh?"

"I'm sorry!" Faust pretended.

"Sniffle...you are?" the little boy asked.

"Yes, yes I'm sorry," he replied.

All of a sudden he felt a whack across his back.

"Hmph. That attack was not sportsmenlike at all."

"Wha? I just hit you on the back with a watermelon! It should be broken or at least fractured!" the woman exclaimed.

"It is fractuerd...only because of my unusual doses of morphine, I don't feel pain whatsoever," Faust countered.

"WAAUUGGHH! YASUNORI, LET'S GO!!!"

"Bye, Mr. Big Man!"

"Bye...Yasunori," he chuckled. "Hmm...so now I'm 'Mr. Big Man'. What a cute little boy. Eliza! Get me the fourth vertebrae of a skeleton in my size and blood type!" Faust demanded. "Clikkity, clack, clikkity, clack...I've heard that so many times I hear it in my sleep."

Just then Faust reached into his bag and pulled out his scalpel, entrusted the replacing and remending of his back to his oversoul, and finally replaced the old one with the new one. (A/N: DISGUSTING! BLECH!)

"Yoh Asakura, I will avenge myself!"

"Hey ya' idiot, GET OFF THE ROAD!!!" some driver shouted.

"Sorry. Have you seen some kid with headphones, with a girl that has a bandanna?" Faust asked him.

"Yeah, they went into house with the number...uh...what was it again? AH YEAH! Otubei Lane 19362!"

"Heh...thank you," Faust snickered. 'Yoh...I will kill you and turn you into part of my skeleton army!'

"Get off the road!!!" he said clenching his teeth.

"Oops...I'm going."

He walked on to the right house took a deep gulp, and knocked. "E-excuse me! Is anyone home?" he asked nervoulsy.

"Yes! What would you like?" Ms. Ochitaka asked kindly.

"Ummm...well, actually I was looking for a, Yoh Asakura. He wouldn't happen to be here would he?"

"Why...yes, yes he is!" Ms. Ochitaka said shocked. "Many people have come to my house, so unfortunately I can't let you stay-"

"Oh, no need to worry about that but can you call Yoh out here?" Faust asked politely.

"Certainly. Excuse me, someone named-oh! What is your name?"

"Faust."

"Thank you, someone named Faust wants to see Yoh!"

"Okay. Idiot...you are way overreacting about this leg thing," Yoh grunted.

"Fool! This is not about my leg anymore! It's for all the times you have publicly humiliated me!!!" Faust yelled.

"Well...WHAT AN IDIOT!!! You saw my friend here! She or he was butt naked in front of a gang of boys! Now THAT'S embarrasing!"

"YES BUT I...I guess your right...I'm sorry. YEAH RIGHT! In all my life, I have never been so humiliated as to be beaten by some worthless BRAT!!!" Faust growled.

"Pah-lease, I can do better than that. What a-"

"There you go again making me sound like some infant!" Faust complained.

"As I said, what a fool..."

"Come on give up now idiot!" Sasuke and Naruto said in symmetry.

"Come on, you couldn't beat Yoh even if ya' had a million years!" Naruto yelled.

"He's right you big asshole!!!" Sasuke said.

"You stay out of this!"

Then he grabbed thier heads, banged them together and let them drop.

"That's strong enought to smash cement...best pray for those idiots!" Faust snickered.

"Sasuke, are you alright?" Kakashi asked.

"Ungg...WHO THE FREAK ARE YOU?!" Sasuke sreamed.

"Who are you, I should be asking you black haired wierdo!!!" Naruto yelled thinking Sasuke was the one who hit him on the head.

"Oh no...amnesia!" Yoh groaned.

"Amnesia?" Sakura questioned.


	3. Double Double, lots of trouble

Sorry for the late post, got sidetracked, and got...well, hope you enjoy this!

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Chapter Three

"It makes you forget a portion of your life...small, or everything of it..."Yoh said nervously.

"Ohhhhhhhhh...wwaaaaooooo..." Naruto moaned.

"Shut up!" Kakashi barked. "Now listen, you two may have forgotten, but I didn't!" He paused a moment and thought... "You two, have recently gotten married and just need to present the rings." Kakashi sniggered.

"But-" Yoh began until Sakura looked mischievous and then glared as if to say, "Say a word - and DIE!"

"Oh...in that case, sorry honey." Sasuke said smoothly and gave her a 'let's go somewhere nice ' look.

Kakashi had to hold in so much laughter he had to pull his mask up. Sakura however...inner Sakura 'If it teaches Naruto a lesson, I have lost Sasuke for now then...'

"So, want to go to a nice dinner?" Naruto asked?

"First, I need to explain who the rest of these people are! The one fighting is...(A/N: You know who they are, so I'll skip this.)

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Well, today was Yoh's day, he knew it was going to be tough to fight a psychic ghost, but Manta was giving him a quick pep talk and shoulder rub.

"All right Yoh, be sure to use your mana wisely, and don't-"

"Don't worry Manta, I got it!"

"Okay...just be sure to-"

"Just be quiet. Okay?" Yoh pleaded.

"SHAMAN FIGHT BEGIN" Yoh's watch announced.

"How do you strike with nothing but a telepath?" Yoh questioned.

"I said she was psychic, not a telepath."

"So?" Manta raised one eyebrow.

"She'll assault your mind, use up your mana, tell me your worst fears, and I have powers to get those scary things." she said in a mystic, creepy way.

"Whatever...bring it on!"

Ms. Ochitaka just stood there and waited. Yoh leaped out at her and swung his sword and she simply moved an inch or two and Yoh's chest jabbed into the hilt of his sword and knocked the air out of him. He gasped for air as he lay there, and gazed at her.

"How - did - you - do - that?" he gasped.

"I simply thought figured, if I dodge this way, he will just slip, but if I do this was, he'll jab into the hilt."

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Naruto and Sasuke went out to a romantic date at the dine-in fancy restaurant that Kakashi owns. (A/N: Kakashi bought a portion of land using money from using jutsus at a circus. snicker snicker Circus...) They had a nice table in the back of the restaurant with a candle light romance setting.

"May I take your order?" the waiter asked.

"_We _will take the special," Sasuke said.

This wasn't meant to be a romance yet, so let's go to an important part of the storyline...has the scene switched yet - oh I guess not...

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Far, far away many ghosts could hear a sound which would not be forgotten anytime soon.

"SSSSSHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTT!"

A figure slammed into the top of a mountain with a filtered, THUD. Naruto's ghost floated up and moaned.

"Hey man! What you in for?" a voice asked

"Huh? I don't know what - you called me a him?" Naruto stared at him.

"Yeah, unless you're flat as a pancake. He..hehehe...pancake..."

"I'm me! No way, well last thing I remember, I got amnesia." (A/N: Last thing he REMEMBERS, is he got AMNESIA! Bu dum - chee!)

"Oh, your almost like me man, I'm in a coma. See, amnesia you have a chance to wake up, but my coma's a bit too extreme to wake up from just like that, dude." he said mistily with a grimace.

"Oh, I'm so sorry - uh, what's your name?" Naruto questioned.

"Takahoshi, you?"

"Naruto, Uzumaki Naruto."

"Well, welcome to the world of ghosts, where you never get tired, hungry, lonely, or anything else besides emotional." Takahoshi smiled.

"Wow...what about your body?"

"Amnesiac bodies can progress the way they think life works, but other bodies just age."

"So...how long have you been a ghost?"

"About...37 years, 3 months, 15 days..."

"So you really miss the real life, huh?

"Soon you will too, man, just wait!"

"I already do..." Naruto then thought about Yoh and all his friends.

"What do you mean, man?"

"Oh, nothing...when trapped in the other form I wonder if I can use justsus..."

"What, man, you into all that freaky jutsu junk, like, I stopped that when I was like, three, man."

"Question, do you know my name, and answer, no, YOU KEEP CALLING ME MAN, OR DUUUUDE!" Naruto screamed, red faced.

"Man, you got like -"

"AND YOU SAY LIIIKEEE!" Naruto yelled again.

"You got anger issues ma - huhuh...Nuhrootoh."

"All right, well, how do you get back into an amnesiac body?"

"The ghost in the body must come out of the body, while the body must remain soulless."

"How do I do that?" Naruto sighed, with a seemingly stretched jaw.

"You can also take the out the parasite ghost, and instantly replace it using a new parasite." (A/N: Parasites and hosts are simply an example, not the situation!)

"Okay, so all I need is another ghost to take the place of my little red dharma." (A/N: Red dharma is a doll without pupils and you fill in one when you start a mission, and fill in the other when you complete it.)

"I guess so."

"Sweet, how do I get the twit out?"

"Well, you need to overshadow someone or just hope your friends have knowledge of the sub-concsious."

"I'll take the quick route. After I overshadow someone, what do I say?"

"Tell, them..."

"Yes?"

"That..."

"YES!"

"They need to knock out the body and the other ghost will wander around until it wakes up." he said, totally ruining the suspension.

"Oh, I thought it would be difficult."

"You have to overshadow people who love you."

"OH...crap, THAT'S the difficult part..."

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Oh, cliffer! What kind of person would love Naruto, find on the next episode of, you know the title. I'll write as fast as these wart torn fingers can write! ;D


	4. The Fight Love 'n' Shaman

Hiyo, once again, sorry for the late reply, my school assigns a ton of work after testing...I don't get why they don't do it before testing...whatever, well read and review!

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Naruto just floated there pondering...

"Who loves me? Sakura?

0000000000000000000 flashback 00000000000000000000000000

"Naruto! You freakin' retard!"

"NARUTO DON'T YOU DARE HURT SASUKE!"

"Naruto-"

"NARUTO-"

"NNNAAAARRRUUUUTTTTOOOOO!

000000000000000000 flash forward 000000000000000000000000

"Maybe not...Kakashi?

000000000000000000 flashback 000000000000000000000000000

"Dunce"

"DUNCE!"

"Stupid Dunce!"

'There's the one time I felt like I was wearing a dunce hat..." grumble grumble

"DUNCE!"

00000000000000000 flash forward 0000000000000000000000000

"Maybe, I'll have to watch myself for a week or two.

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"Ohhh...Ouch! Yoh are you alright?" Manta called out.

"Yeah, I guess I need to think before I act..."

"Whatever...bring it on!" Ms. Ochitaka mimicked.

"Rrrgh. Your going down!" Yoh yelled.

"Tsk, tsk, tsk, temper, temper, temper!" Ms. Ochitaka said tauntingly.

"Shut up!" Yoh's rage over took him and he did his...what SEEMED to be his best 3-jab...and it ended really badly.

Ms. Ochitaka simply held up a rock, but when the sword hit, his feet slid on the dirt and he fell flat on his back. Yoh looked at his mana gauge and he realized that it was only 2/3 of what it used to be.

'Okay, this can't be good, she knows my every move...'

"Sure do." she replied right after he got done thinking.

'Wait! All I need to do is not think!'

"Even though it is upon rare occasion that you do!" Ms. Ochitaka said, joking around. "Hate to break it to you, but it is never actually possible to stop thinking, due to your subconscious. You might not even know it, but it is true."

Yoh took a while just trying to figure out a subconscious was.

"Okay then, I guess I'll just have to think too much!" Yoh said with a triumphant grin.

'Iloveponies!Ilove left upper jab anna!Ilovekitties!'

"What?" Ms. Ochitaka said, trying not to laugh and trying to concentrate all at the same time.

Whack! Ms. Ochitaka went into the air and then fell with a thud.

"Yeah, go Yoh!"

"Heh." Yoh said thinking about everything...no, I mean, everything!

Yoh repeated this method for a long time.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Okay, someone who loves me...I need to go to a school."

"Oh, and Nuhrootoh, someone has to love this form of you, not the girl." (A/N: Naruto told him the entire story.)

"OK, and I do this how?"

"Find an oversoul man, find something that relates to you, but, in your case, you'll turn into your body. Find someone who loves your boy form."

"MAN"

"Yeah, whatever-MAN form. So find someone to help you."

"Alright, I'll go find something I own."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The shaman fight continued as it was last left. Ms. Ochitaka had cuts and wounds everywhere.

'Crap! Mana is down to 19/124!' Ms. Ochitaka thought as she stared at her watch.

"Given up?

"No and I will not until all of my mana is gone!" she said determinedly.

"Ms. Ochitaka, I know you personally and I don't want to kill, or hurt you."

"Yoh, this is a shaman fight...you need to do what you need to do."

-----------------------------------Ms. Ochitaka-------------------------------

"Yoh, this is a shaman fight...you need to do what you need to do."

'It is getting hard to see...my vision is going rather blurry.."

"Need to win..." I remember up until this...what happened? Everything is dark...I can't see anything. Where's Yoh? What's he thinking? Uuuhhnnnnn...

"Ms. Ochitaka!"

"Are you okay?"

"Go get an ice pack, or Horo Horo! Hurry!"

"Don't woerew uin-"

"Unnghhh..." Ms. Ochitaka moaned.

-----------------------------------Narrator---------------------------------

"Don't worry Ms. Ochitaka, we'll help you!"

"Unnghhh..."

"Here's some ice!" Manta got back.

"Alright, alright, give it here, give it here!" Yoh said.

"Okay, okay!" Manta mocked.

"Thanks..." he said sulkily.

"Yoh, I just remembered, what happened to Amidamaru's body?"

"Oh, he has it, he comes out for fights, but he still uses it."

"See Master Manta?"

"Holy crap!" Manta said as Amidamaru came up behind him.

Will Ms. Ochitaka be okay, will Manta ever stop being scared of Amidamaru? Find out on the next time we come to these characters!

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We find Naruto coming out of the restaurant with Sasuke and unbeknownst to them, they're being followed by ghost Naruto!

"Hmph...if ANYONE will have some of my stuff it'll be this bitch..."

"Sasuke I need to go somewhere, okay?"

"Alright love." Sasuke said, staring into Naruto's beautiful eyes.

Naruto headed toward the mall, while the Naruto ghost followed her.

"Hi," Naruto said.

"Hi jerk- wait, have you known that I've been here the entire time that you've been making googly eyes at Sasuke, you didn't tell him, and you didn't talk to me before this?"

"Yep, ever take a breath?"

"NO, I'm a GHOST!" Naruto's ghost glared.

"Oh, right! Just like I used to be."

"You used to be a ghost?"

"Ha! You IDIOT! You honestly thought that a ghost just materializes, JUST to take another's place? No, I used to be a living breathing human, now that I am again, I'm going to keep my life! And, I'm going to keep this boyfriend!"

"I don't care about the boyfriend, but that is my body!"

"Well now it's mine!" she said with a cruel face.

"You're going to pay for this!" Naruto's ghost glared.

"Sorry, all I got is 50 yen! Hahahah!" she laughed as she walked away.

"Stupid bitch, with her stupid Sasuke, and her stupid purse, and her stupid sense of humor..." Naruto's ghost said crankily.

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Ms. Ochitaka was taken back to her house and placed in her comfy chair.

"Ms. Ochitaka? Are you okay?" Kakashi asked.

"Oh...I'm starting to feel better," she replied.

"Good," everyone sighed.

"Ms. Ochitaka, would you like some assistance to your room?" Kakashi asked.

"Yes please," Ms. Ochitaka said.

"Okay," he replied.

They got Ms. Ochitaka to her room and then everyone left but Kakashi.

"Ms Ochitaka...I don't know how to tell you this...but I feel...I love...you," Kakashi said, releasing was seemed to be a vacuum of air.

"Well," she blushed. "I've never actually had someone say that before...like you, I don't know how to say this, but..."

'Expect the worst...' Kakashi thought.

"I love you too," she replied.

If you could see his mouth, you'd know that it was smiling in shock. "Well...in that case, I know a very nice restaurant, owned by a local ninja," Kakashi chuckled.

"Well, would that local ninja like to go to his restaurant with the girl he says he loves?"

"Yes. He'd like to go with the girl he KNOWS he loves," he smiled. he then went over to her and hugged her. After a while, he pulled away from the hug and left the room with a mask smile.

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Naruto's ghost had to go back to the house if he had any hope of finding something of his possession.

"Alright...in position... duns the mission impossible theme time to search my room!"

Naruto opens the chest of drawers and finds a thong and says to himself, "I don't even want to know."

He looks into the closet and finds the general clothes, but as he looks at the back corner he sees something that reminded him of the greatest moment of his life. The Konohakagure Leafband. He remembers the very day that Iruka took off his own headband just to give it to Naruto. The second Naruto touched it, he fell to the ground with a flop. Then, even though it is rare that they do, an idea formed in Naruto's head.

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Sorry for the lateness again, I got grounded! well, R&R please!


	5. Chapter 5

The early post is due to the lateness of my last one, so I hope you guys haven't been overloaded, jk ;) So please R & R.

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Naruto thought abut the school he had gone to before in buck nekkid girl form, and so he figured, 'just enroll myself in a school and instantly get a girlfriend!' At least if they think he's good looking.

Naruto headed toward the living room and he got Kakashi alone and said, "Kakashi, this is my ghost that looks like a human, but you can feel me, and I need to go to school and get myself enrolled to get a girlfriend who I can overshadow and return to my REAL body!" Naruto said gasping for air.

"And you want me to do what?"

"I need you to pose as my parent, because I need you to meet the principal or someone," Naruto said, still gasping.

"Alrighty then. Just as long as you never, ever tell your girlfriend our secret."

"Of course not, she is just a tool in our operation," Naruto said harshly.

"First we need to find a school that we can enroll you in, because a lot of the schools are specific gender schools. We need to find one that has girls and boys!" Kakashi said beginning to sound rather bored.

"Don't worry, I can read so, let's just go around and find a school!"

"Fine."

They headed for the Jaguar that Kakashi bought.

"Holy crap...how do you afford all this?"

"Get a job. And believe it or not, Konohakagure and Japan use the same money. It's really helpful if you actually try to do something with your life."

"I am! I'm trying to get it back!"

"Whatever, let's go."

They cruised around until Naruto found a bit a shock...Takahoshi's Mixed School.

"There! I wanna go there!"

"Okay, okay, let's go," Kakashi said, steaming.

They parked in the closest parking spot they could find and then they entered the office.

"Excuse me ma'am," Kakashi said as politely he could. "I would like to enroll my son in this school.

"Ok, but I hope you don't mind talking to the assistant principal, you see, the principal...he went into a coma due to a fall of the second story of his house," the woman behind the desk replied.

"Oh...other than the principal, I don't mind. Does he have any chance of ever waking up?"

"Oh, yes, but the chances are quite slim," she replied grimly.

"Well, we'll pray for his wakening."

"Thank you, but onto important matters. Here is the paperwork that you need to fill out if your son is to join the school."

"Alright, just a second," Kakashi said.

It took a while to fill it out, and then he handed in the paperwork.

"Alright, I checked all records and all the information seems legitimate, so sign here...here...and here! Thanks you, your son can start  
Tuesday," She said happily.

"Alright. Thank you for your time," Kakashi said, returning the cheerful smile, and as Naruto sighed, Kakashi knew, this was not going to be an easy mission.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ms. Ochitaka sat in her room as she thought that she might not be called Ms., but she would be called Mrs.

'I finally might have a relationship...'

"We're home!" everyone heard Naruto and Sasuke call.

"Why, hello you two lovebirds, where have you been?" Sakura asked playfully.

"We just went to Kakashi's restaurant. You make it sound like we're naughty." Naruto said.

They chatted about random things. But eventually, they got onto the subject of...

"Naruto...It's been a while since we got our memory back and so I think it's about time I asked this..." he got onto one knee. "Naruto? Will you marry me?

-----------------------The next day at school-------------------------------

"Everyone, we have a new student joining us today. This is Uzumaki Naruto, and I expect you all to give him a warm welcome," the teacher said with a glare to all the students. "I hope that you enjoy it at our school. I'm Mr. Himisho, and this is Class President Kyushu."

A boy from the corner waved at him and he smiled back at him. "Umm, isn't Kyushu-" (A/N: It's one of the first Japanese civilizations.)

"Yeah, don't talk to him about that, because it's something he doesn't exactly like to talk about it."

"It's just a name. Why's he so sentimental?"

"He HATES being named after things. Even when it's someone, something, or somewhat else."

"Ah. Alright, so what should we be working on?"

"Well, you and the classmates that you are working with need to make a model of a theme park, and because we have been studying India, Rome, Greece, Mesopotamia, Egypt, and China, the theme parks have to be built off of one of those places. I'll give you China, okay?"

"Alright. Which group?"

"You'll be assigned to China II."

"Alright." Naruto looked at the group. There was the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen...of course, other than Sakura.

"Hi, I'm Deiji, this guy here likes to be called Taka, (A/N: After the Idol DJ Taka! Woohoo!) and this is Emi."

"Hi, Deiji, Taka...Emi," Naruto emphasized the last one a little bit.

"Hi Naruto, so what we have so far is the restaurants and the rides, but we still need to complete all six exhibits. We have all the materials needed, but because we're using styrofoam, we can't use hot glue guns or else it'll melt. So we're have difficulty finding means of making things stay. Because we haven't painted yet, you're in charge of decorations. Got it?" Emi asked.

"Yeah, so where's the paint and stuff?"

"Here's some paint, some Model Magic, and some glue! We'll go work on the exhibits whiile you decorate."

"Alright," Naruto said, felling the foamy Model Magic.

"Seal everything back up when you're done." Emi finished.

Naruto then got to work with the rides. He looked at the model and had to go ask... "Umm, can I get something that will tell me what color to make everything?"

"Alright," Deiji said. "You'll get Emi."

"Hey, you can't just tell me what to do, but ok," she said to him playfully. "Let's go Naruto."

"Alright, so what color is this ride going to be?"

"The top will need to be red, and the bottom is going to be blue, you know, to make contrast."

"Alright..."Naruto squirted out some paint on a sponge brush and began to paint.

"Try to do your best at keeping it an even coat.

"Will do!" he smiled back.

Naruto and Emi already felt like somthing together...but did we get Emi's point of view?

'He's so nice! I wonder...does he already have a girlfriend? I bet he does...I can't imagine of a girl that wouldn't like him. Every girl at this school seems to have the same taste...that must be why.' she thought as she smiled.

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At Kakashi's restaurant we see a happy couple at the edge of the restaurant.

"Ms. Ochitaka, I'm quite glad that we've been able to get some time together."

"Ahem. Excuse me, may I take your order."

"Oh, yes, can I please get the Spaghetti and soup of the day?" Kakashi asked. (A/N: Soup of the day sound funny. Teehee!)

"And can I get the Special?"

"Eh, right away Monsieur and Mademoiselle."

"I don't remember hiring him..." Kakashi said with a confused look. "Well then, I'll just remember why I came here...My guys gonna take a while, so tell me a little about yourself."

"Well I am twenty-nine, I work as a substitute teacher at a school, I am also a shaman, and I can read minds!" Ms. Ochitaka said.

"I'm twenty-six, I work as a Ninjustu Master at a training school, I also have a Sharingan, and I can see the future," Kakashi imitated playfully.

"Let me guess, the Sharingan lets you see the future."

"What, did I change a word? Was I off?" he chuckled.

"Ahem, your food Mademoiselle...and Monsieur. Bon Apetit!" the Waiter said with a bowing leave.

"Wow, your food tastes wonderful Kakashi! We need to come here more often!" Ms. Ochitaka said, impressed.

"Thank you."

Awwww, we'll leave these two lovebirds alone! Let's go to the other love birds!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Wait so Emi, the restaurants are going to be pink? I think that the kiddy ride should be pink, and the restaurants should be blue!" Naruto said.

"Well, I'm not the one who got the ideas, I totally agree with you."

"What? I thought that you were the one that made the blueprints. If you didn't, which of you did?"

"It was Deiji's idea. I told him that he was crazy. Taka thought that it would be a good idea. Then I told both of them that they are nuts! What wierdos would paint a restaurant such a bright pink?"

"I guess, wierdos such as Deiji and Taka," Naruto laughed.

---------------------The Next School Day-------------------------------

"Hey Emi," Naruto came up to her.

"Oh, hey Naruto! Listen, today we got a airbrush, so now we can paint quicker!"

"Airbrush?" Naruto questioned. 'Some kind of...vacuum brush?'

"Oh, don't you know what an airbrush is? Well, you put a marker...here...blow on this end...here...and viola!"

Naruto saw the styrofoam slowly being invisibly painted. "Cool!I can't beleive I've never heard of this thing! How many do you have?"

"I'm giving everyone in the group one, so here's yours!"

Naruto stared at it. It just looked like a funny tube with a sight stuck on the side. He wondered, how on Earth did the color shoot out of the marker? "this thing is awesome! Let's get to work!" Naruto was extremely excited about using this new thing.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sasuke just proposed to the hot girl form of Naruto...

"Umm...Wow...WOW! Sasuke...I really don't know what to say, I know what I want to say, but I don't know if I should say it before I think of the consequences ... Sasuke, I would love to marry you!"

"Yeah!" Sasuke screamed, crying for joy. (A/N: Keep in mind, this is the AMESIAC Sasuke, not the real sasuke!

"So, hon, when will the wedding be held?"

"It'll be ready by...so we can hold it in THREE DAYS!" Sasuke said.

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I figured that, that would be a good place to end due to the fact it makes a nice cliffie! Will Naruto get the girl within three days? Will Kakashi tell Naruto that he only _has _three days? Will I ever stop asking "Will's"? It will remain a mystery for a while!


	6. Feel the love!

Hiyo! Thanks for the reviews! All my fans...I thank you! cue dramatic music I'm so happy to be here today and I...want to thanks my parents, for not grounding me long enough to write this, and I want to thank my brain, for not dying during school! Whatever, just R, E, & R (Read, Enjoy, & Review!) ; D

PS Sorry for being late, but my modem got fried by lightning...

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Two days left before the marriage ceremony...

"Alright so, what color are the letters on the restaurant going to be?" Naruto asked.

"Yours are your choice, mine are blue, Deiji's are red, and Taka wants his to be yellow!" Emi replied.

"Ok, can mine be turquoisy-yellowish?"

"That's a odd combination, but it'll go somewhat with your restaurant!" she smiled as an okay.

"Alright." Naruto then mixed the paint for his, seeing as they didn't have a turqiouse-yellow marker. He then got on with the painting, but then then Emi came over with a bit of a determined look on her face.

"Naruto, I've liked you ever since you came into the group, And I wanna know, would you like to go out Saturday?" Emi asked with a breath of air let out.

"Well, I hate to tell you this..."

Emi expected the worse, and she thought in her head... 'He has a girlfriend...'

"You're gonna have to put up with me for an entire Saturday!" he chuckled.

Emi smiled and walked back to the rest of the group.

'Bingo. I am now prepared to overshadow,' Naruto smiled as he thought.

"Naruto! Get to work!" Deiji shouted.

"OK!" Naruto yelled back. "Grumpy old so-and-so!"

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Morning back at the Ochitaka residence.

"Ahhhhh..." Kakashi yawned, with sleep in his eye.

"Morning Kakashi," Sasuke said with a tired face.

"Why're you so tired?" Kakashi asked noticing the suitcases under Sasuke's eyes.

"Naruto and I spent all night thinking of a name for our first child."

Kakashi had to supress the look of utter disgust that was consuming him inside. "What did you decide on?"

"Hikaru."

"Oh, that's a nice name, why did you decide on it?"

"Because, it means brave and courageous, and I hope that he will be as brave and courageous as you Kakashi," Naruto smiled.

"Why do you call me brave?" Kakashi asked with a confused face.

"Even though you knew the truth, you told Sasuke and me that we were married, and to lie to two very powerful ninjas take courage," Naruto said with a chuckle.

"When...HOW did you find out?" Kakashi asked.

"Come-ON! Are you as dimwitted as Naruto? A ghost isn't made just to take the place of the lost amnesiac-"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah I know all this but, how did you know about Naruto being a boy, the not being married, all that?"

"I didn't know that he was a boy until I saw his ghost the other day, but I sure did know the other stuff. Do you think that all ghosts just sit around their death spot every day of their non-life? We have lives, not technically speaking but, we look and hear!" Naruto said, talking to Kakashi as if he were a foreigner.

"I know, but..were you stalking us or something?" Kakashi asked.

"Well, you know you are really cute!" Naruto said, blowing a kiss.

Kakashi didn't know to be flattered, because it's not Naruto, or disgusted, because...well it's just plain wrong!

"Well, you in that body, you're not half bad yourself," Kakashi said.

"Well, don't get to attached to this body, because I'll turn into my normal form within 3 more days after the marriage."

Kakashi's hidden eye widened as to not show any care for this to Naruto.

"Well, I thought you'd take that much worse, knowing the person you are!" Naruto said, rather disappointed.

How about I give you a bit of a cliffie, and I take you to a person who everyone has forgotten.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Far, far back in time, and another ghost floated gracefully to the floor.

"Oh boy, this is interesting. I'll get started right away...someone who loves me...now, where is Sakura?" Sasuke's voice said as If nothing happened.

Sasuke gazed around and realized. This wasn't Japan anymore. He saw an arcade with kids playing this thing called "DDR", (A/N: WHICH TOTALLY ROCKS!) others playing...Mehtal Sluhg? There were tens of games and kids shouting in some strange language.

"Hey, you have the newest Pokeeman card?" one kid asked another.

'Pokemon?' Sasuke remembered from Japan.

"Did you catch the newest episode of Inuyasha?" (American pronunciation:   
ee noo yeah shuh)

'Inu Yasha?' (True pronunciation: ee noo yah shah)

Sasuke had no idea what totally, completely messed up version of Japan he ended up in. Due to the fact that Sasuke had some knowledge of the supernatural realm, he knew that ghosts could teleport as long a they had a vivid idea of the area they were teleporting to.

"I wonder what ghost is in my body," Sasuke said as Yoh's house appeared around him.

"Sasuke?" he heard Yoh say.

'I didn't think that someone would be here."

"Why are you-" Yoh looked around and out the door. "Why are you here?"

"It took me a while to get back here, because I had to remember your house."

"Well, yeah, but, why right here, couldn't you have done the graveyard? This is an akward place! Here's a picture, go to the graveyard!" Yoh said pushing him into the closet. (A/N: Yoh can touch ghosts, and they can touch him...Boy, does that sound wrong!)

"Ok, I'm going!" Sasuke growled.

Sasuke then appeared in the graveyard, and as he look around, he knew that Sakura loved him, so he headed out to find Sakura.

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I bet you all forgot about the real Sasuke, didn'cha! And...ACTION! Oh, here you go...

1 Day Left! Saturday is the day...

"I'm really glad that I can be with you tonight..." Emi said, blushing.

"I'm really glad you're nothing like Deiji...I'm also glad his wierdness didn't rub off on you!" Naruto said playfully.

"Are you ready to place your orders?" a waiter asked.

"Yeah, can we get the spaghetti?" Naruto asked politely. (A/N: x 2  
1. Of course it has to be the spaghetti 2. Naruto being polite? as if...)

"Yes, drinks?" the waiter asked them.

"Can I get a Sprite?" Naruto asked the waiter.

"And can I get a Vanilla Bubble?" (A/N: Bubble, another funny word...teehee.)

"Absolutely. Your order should get here in thirty minutes," the waiter said, with a leaving bow.

"Wow, we sure rushed into dating, we've barely met for a week and...two days?" Emi wondered.

"Three days. Did you know that your eyes are like a shining green tree?" Naruto said, staring her in the eyes.

"Thank you," she giggled. "And your eyes are orange?" Emi said staring like he's crazy.

"Oh!" Naruto suddenly remembered. "They're...contacts! I can hardly see without them!"

"Oh. They look really cool! Where did you get yours?"

"Special made...my uncle made 'em!" Naruto said apologetically.

"Here's your meal," the waiter said, with 3 plates balanced on his. "Your spaghetti...your bread, if you want it...and your drinks," the waiter said, setting down three plates.

"Oh wow, this looks delicious! Thank you very much!" Emi said to the waiter.

"Shall we," Naruto asked, pointing a hand at the spaghetti.

"Ok."

They began to eat their spaghetti and as the ate they just felt like they were closer together.

"They began to lean towards each other when the spaghetti was diminished.

'Excellent, the second she kisses me, I overshadow her,' Naruto thought.

She leaned in to kiss him, but as he got close, he couldn't come out.

'What? I can't come out, I can just go nearer and I get close and...' Naruto's subconscious slowly slid away until he was just kissing her.

Naruto then realized, he needs to tell her.

He pulled away. "Listen, Emi, I need to tell you the truth about me. I'm not from Japan."

"Oh, I don't mind, foreigners are no different to me," she said smiling at him.

"No, I'm from...Konohakagure...a ninja village "Hidden in the Leaves." I'm not from this continent, not even this world that I know of. I am from a completely different realm...I think."

"Naruto, what are you talking about? I know that your from this world, there are no other worlds!" (A/N: Kingdom Hearts would disagree...)

"Look at this then..." Naruto said.

He put his hand together in a combonation of maneuvers and then a double of him appeared right next to Emi.

"Holy crap!" Emi blurted as she fell of her chair. The double quickly ducked down so that no one saw.

"Uhh, sorry, sorry, go back to your dinners..." Emi said, embarrassed, as she got back into her chair.

"You see...I'm...a ghost at the moment. I found an item of mine, and now I can turn human. This is a really long story that the writer is too lazy to write, so, I need your help to get back into my human, normal, not-dead, and healthy body!" Naruto said gasping for air.

"Oh...'kay...soo...you need MY help...so is that the only reason you went out with me?" Emi asked, a tear on the verge of forming.

"No, I don't want to sound like a movie, but that's only the way it started out."

"You sounded like a movie..." Emi said as she began to get up.

Naruto grabbed her hand. "Emi! I love you though!" Naruto blurted out.

"No...I'm just a tool. I bet that's ever you thought of me as..." Emi said as a tear dashed down her face.

"Emi, what do you want that I can give to show my love?" Naruto asked.

"Get me a diamond ring, not for marriage, just to be kind," Emi said angrily.

"Fine, I'll get it for you, you'll have it by tomorrow!" Naruto promised.

"If you can, then I might forgive you. That would prove to me the truth or lie."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

People stared at the tall samurai, walking wobbly to the old haunted house.

"A...Amidamaru, how long have you been using that body?" Manta asked.

"A week, Master Manta..." Amidamaru said, using his sword as a steady.

"And you still can't walk? Here, Put your legs closer...about three feet closer...and don't slouch...and here...there, now try walking!" Manta said.

"Okay, like this?" Amidamaru slowly walked, but he started slouching again.

"Why do you slouch?"

"You try walking after this many years! All my muscle left my body..." Amidamaru then fell to the ground with a thud.

"We have work to do..." Manta said, slapping his forehead.

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DAY OF THE WEDDING!

The organist was practicing the song. In the back room...

"Sakura, can you zip up the back?" Naruto asked.

"Sure, just a sec!" Sakura did it.

This part would be boring if I wrote it, so I'll skip to the chase.

"Do you, Uchiha Sasuke, take this woman, to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

"I do," Sasuke said, smiling.

"And do you, Uzumaki Naruto, take this man, to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

"I do!" Naruto said.

"Do you have the ring, Sasuke?"

"Yes," Sasuke grabbed the ring from Kakashi and brought it over to Sakura's hand but...

"I need this, thanks!" Naruto poofed in and then out.

"What was that? Wha? WHERE'S THE RING!" Sasuke shouted.

"I don't have it..." everyone in the audience said randomly.

"The spell won't work without the diamond!" Naruto screamed.

"What spell?" everyone in the audience asked randomly.

"I was going to turn back to my normal self in three hours after the wedding!" Now it won't work!" Naruto screamed. "If I don't get the ring within the next three hours, this body will return to it's earliest form!"

"That means he'll be..." Kakashi said with a worried face. "Either he turns into this girl...or he turns into the Nine Tailed Fox Demon..."

Sakura Suddenly leaped out and hit Sasuke in the head, with all her might. Sasuke was out cold. He then rose up, only seconds after.

"Sakura...thank you for loving me," Sasuke smiled. (A/N: The real Sasuke Smiled)

"No prob -" Sasuke kissed her.

"You got my body back for me, so...that's a ONE time action!" Sasuke said with his usual frown.

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Naruto came up to Emi.

"Hi, what do you want?" Emi said quickly.

"I want to give you this!" Naruto held out the ring.

"Ohmygoshhowdidyouaffordthatisyourfamilylikesuperrichorsomething?" Emi asked, slurring it all together.

"No, but I had a goal, and I wanted to reach it more than anything," Naruto said, smiling.

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I hope you enjoyed that chapter, because you won't get another for quite a while, my modem was fried by a lightning strike


	7. Foxy ladies and Narutos?

Enjoy this chappy, cause It will be the most dramatic, loving, and emotional one you have ever encountered.

R E & R

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"Naruto...use my body and get yours back. I realize it must be bad to be a ghost..." Emi said, closing her eyes.

"No. It just feels wrong to use someone for something like this..."

A bunch of leaves blew to Naruto and I formed a sentence.

_Naruto, Two hours before devastation. at the chapel, Kakashi_

"Emi, I need to go, something is going to happen to me or Sasuke, so I need to leave."

"But what about your body?" Emi asked, grasping for Naruto's dissolving hands.

"If I don't do this, I might lose it. Emi...I'm sorry..." Naruto said as a tear and the rest of him dissolved.

"Naruto. I hope I'll see you again..." Emi said, looking to where the leaves blew away.

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Sasuke is now back in his body...

"Listen, Naruto's going to be here soon, so can you give him back his body?" Kakashi asked.

"No, he needs to get it back. If he can't, then he'll pay the price." Evil Naruto said.

"Give me my body!" Naruto shouted.

"Come and get it!"

"Naruto, use me to knock it out!" he heard Emi scream.

"Emi, how did you know where I was?" Naruto smiled.

"Keeping up with those leaves is hard, but I did it. Now come on dummy! Get your body back!" Emi said, beginning to cry.

"Alright...let's do this."

Naruto melted into Emi's body, and ran up to the other Naruto. She grabbed one of the bibles off the pews and tried to whack Naruto in the head...but suddenly the other Naruto grew a strange tail.

"Oh no. It's starting. Naruto, If you don't get your body back within 50 minutes, nothing can be done...You will destroy Japan as the Nine - Tailed Fox Demon. No one will be able to stop you, and you will never revert," Kakashi said, staring with his visible eye.

"Alright..." Naruto stood there as if he was thinking hard. He then did his many a Sexy-no Jutsu.

"What? You think that this would work on another woman! Idiot..." she said.

"No but this might!" Naruto came up from behind, and whacked the book over her head. But unfortunately...the next step took place. It's body expanded to about the size of a elephant. Instead the Demon switched places with her and bit her on the stomach.

"NOO! EMIII!" Naruto screamed from in her body.

Emi fell to the ground, with blood dripping onto the carpet. She pushed her body up, and ran back to the demon.

"Emi! Are you crazy! You'll get yourself killed!" Naruto screamed to herself.

"I want to help you! I realized, I love you, and that I need to protect and help you," Emi said, picking up one of the candelabras.

"I'm not worth the death of you, and I think that I'm much less important alive than you!" Naruto said, trying to pull back Emi.

"If you die, we couldn't go out anymore, get married have kids, and we couldn't fall back in love when we see each other..." Emi was crying harder than ever and she just looked at the fox demon as it grew all nine tails.

The fox then lashed out with it's razor sharp teeth, and caught Emi's arm, then the demon swung her across to one of the pews.

"EMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!" Naruto screamed as he saw Emi's muscles weaken.

"Don't worry Naruto, I'll try to keep her alive!" Sakura grabbed some bandages and began wrapping them around the wounds.

After the stomach was covered, Emi tied the arm one quickly and then dashed back to the monster.

"Ten minutes Naruto and or Emi!" Kakashi yelled.

Emi grabbed the Headband of Naruto's and she tied it around the podium. Emi tipped it over on top of her. She began scooting it over to the monster, but she heard it roar and so she dashed sideways and narrowly dodged the crushing power of the demon's paw.

"Alright, you're going down!" Emi yelled as she jumped onto the back of the demon. She jabbed the candelabra into the demon's eye.

"AAAAAAUUUUGGGGH!" Naruto screamed.

"Interesting, it seems whatever happens to the Demon also happens to Naruto."

"Looks like I need to knock it out now..." Emi grabbed the bible she had and repeatedely beat the Demon across the head.

"Ten..."

The demon got knocked out...nine...naruto got out of Emi's body...eight...he flew all around her and looked at her wounds...SEVEN...he flew into the head of the demon...SIX...he looked for the heart as quickly as he could...FIVE...He found the heart, he just needed to fly into it...FOUR...he flew into the heart...THREE...it awoke as Naruto...TWO...it changed back into the regular, naked girl Naruto.

"Ohhhhhhnn..." Naruto groaned as she stretched out.

"What...why is Naruto a girl? And naked?" Emi asked Kakashi.

"Naruto's prank jutsu. It was used to get past the Hokage for a secret scroll."

"But why is he still naked? And a girl?"

"Because he got stuck in this jutsu."

"Oh," Emi dashed over and covered her...parts... "Come on, look away! Sakura, come up and help me get her to wherever you live!" Emi said bossily.

"Alright!" Sakura came up and lifted Naruto to the house.

-------------------------------time gap---------------------------------

"Place her here on the bed!" Emi said to Sakura.

"Emi, haven't your wounds been hurting?" Sakura asked.

"Yes, but Naruot needdded to get heer..." Emi said as she fell to the ground.

"Oh crap!" she barely heard Sakura scream. "Kakashi! Her wounds! They're gushing blood!"

------------------------------time gap-----------------------------------

"Uhhhhnnnn...How long have I been asleep?" Emi asked.

"You fell asleep Sunday, and now it's 3:00 p.m. Monday," Kakashi replied.

"What about school?" Emi asked.

"I told them you were hit by a car."

"Oh...Well, what about Naruto?"

"Still asleep. Right over there."

Emi looked at the couch where a naked sleeping Naruto was there.

"Why does she still have no clothes on!" Emi asked, grossed out.

"We can't dress her while she's asleep. None of us feel right doing it."

"At least put a blanket over her!" Emi said staring at Kakashi like he was a molester.

"We were using them all to cover the wounds," Kakashi said, staring back.

Emi looked at her stomach which was covered with some lovely red sheets.

"They used to be white. I think that the reason the wounds haven't sealed up is because of the demon's magic. It should seal up by tomorrow though. You have quite a bit of courage you know...the Demon rampaged our village many years ago, and the only one that could do what you did, the fourth Hokage. I was the only one he entrusted with his secret, and I promised to him that I would never tell anyone it. But Naruto needs to know, so I'll tell you..."

What is his secret?

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Back at the church.

"Ms. Ochitaka, what was Naruto thinking when he did his Sexy - no Jutsu?"

"Well, I didn't read his mind, but it was a distraction. I would've thought that you would be one of the first people to realize that. What's happening to you?" Sasuke felt his chin and he was growing a shaved beard.

"Bastard..." Sasuke growled as he quickly ran out of the church.

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"Uhhn..." Naruto woke up finally.

"Naruto!" Emi ran over and hugged Naruto.

"Ow!" Naruto clenched his head as if someone repeatedly whacked it with a bible.

"Naruto! Are you okay?" Emi asked, covering her mouth.

"Yeah..."

"Naruto...Your whiskers are gone..." Kakashi said touching his cheek. "And get some clothing on..."

"My whiskers...gone? And, I'm naked? Emi, don't look at me!" Naruto said covering his crotch area.

"You're still a girl Naruto..." Kakashi said.

"Oh. Alright Kakashi, just do something with your sharingan and find the way to turn me normal!" Naruto said, pleadingly.

"Make this sign," Kakashi said quickly, and showing him the sign.

"What...wait...wait what? What? You knew that the entire time?" Naruto asked, curiously.

"Yeah."

"WHY THE &# DIDN'T YOU TELL ME WHAT TO MOTHER &$# DO!" Naruto screamed at him.

"I like playing games with you!" Kakashi smiled. (A/N: At least they think...)

Naruto did the sign and he exploded in a poof of smoke. He was back in his normal self completely.

"Naruto!" Emi smiled. She tackled him to the floor and gave him a kiss.

Naruto kissed her back and just thought, 'This is the best that I've ever felt.'

"Naruto I thought you were dead! I gave you such horrible wounds with the bible and stuff...I'm so sorry!" Emi wiped away a tear on her arm as she buried her face into Naruto's jacket.

"Emi...It's okay! I don't...Emi! How are your wounds!" Naruto asked sitting up quickly.

"Don't worry! My wounds are fine, don't worry!" Emi said.

Naruto lifted up her shirt to below her boobs.

"Naruto!" Emi said covering her chest.

"Emi..." Naruto gasped. Emi's stomach was almost completely lined with stitches.

"It's okay! Don't worry!" Emi said hugging Naruto close to her again.

"No, all this is my fault..." Naruto leaned on Emi's shoulder and began to cry again.

"Naruto...I..." Kakashi began. "I know the identity of your father..."

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Goodnight. Please review and review nicely! Correct any errors I made, but no flames please! My series may be ending shortly, but that is a slim chance. SOMEONE PLEASE REVIEW ME WITH NARUTO'S AGE! Needed ASAP!


	8. Near the end, or the huh?

Kakashi's secret will be discovered? Sounds very wrong...

R E & R

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"I know the identity of your father..." Kakashi said with a sigh. "Your father was the Fourth Hokage..."

"Wait...does that mean that I killed my own father?" Naruto asked with a strong accent of depression.

"No, no, he even told me. Everyone needs to think of you as a hero, not a killer!" Kakashi said quickly.

"So...I'm the reason I'm...an orphan. I just want to see his face..." Naruto said, collapsing onto Emi.

"Ack! No! Kakashi just said, it was because he wanted to save your life, not because of your demon!" Emi said, groaning in pain.

"Sorry!" Naruto got up quickly.

"Naruto, I am one of the only ones that your father left with this secret...I promised to him that I would never tell you, until you knew you were ready," Kakashi said.

"You think I'm ready! I got teleported to a new world/time/life, I got transformed into a girl because of my mentor's sick mind, and I nearly killed my own girlfriend! Not to mention everything else that happened!" Naruto vented.

"On mental strength status, you've been through more than enough to have a stronger heart than anyone I know," Kakashi smiled.

Naruto took a long pause. He was being praised by Kakashi, one of their world's most deadly, and/or famous ninja. "I just...I just want to see his face...just once. I want to know what he looks like..." Naruto sat on the couch.

"I'll be able to help you there!" they heard a voice say, coming from a bedroom.

"Anna?" Naruto asked.

"Anna!" Kakashi celebrated.

"No, it's Anna," she said in a normal tone.

"Anna...just because you can tie me to the treadmill, doesn't mean you should set it to DASH!" Manta stormed out with ropes falling off, and his face looked like it had been drawn on by a red Sharpie.

"I need to work on my knot tying..." Anna mumbled to herself.

"Can we get back on the subject! I want to see the Fourth Hokage!" Naruto clapped his hand to his forehead.

"Alright."

Anna began saying something, and she did something with her beads and...something happened...? I don't know, so enjoys this miniclip of Sasuke!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sasuke dashed out of the church. He ran across the road, nearly getting hit by someone.

"Watch it, asshole!" the man shouted.

"Need this for a moment!" Sasuke kicked the guy out the passenger window and sped of to the edge of the city.

"Come on..." Sasuke's beard was still there, but now his hair was going a brownish blond. "SHIT!" the road that Sasuke was headed for was closed off for construction. "Hope I can still do this right..." Sasuke made many signs and exhaled as a meteor of blindingly bright flame escaped his mouth and he was catapulted across part of the construction...but he landed in a cement - filled wheelbarrow.

Sasuke quickly got out, but had a bunch of construction workers chasing him. His hand dashed to his pocket where he quickly swung up and threw a Kunai at one of the men. The man thought Sasuke missed, but then he felt a tug, and saw the knife on the side of his head. The knife went straight through his ear and pinned him to a wooden structure. As the pain finally kicked in, he screamed and began yanking on the knife, but it kept on hurting his ear, so the other men had to do it. Sasuke found himself at a dock with an island about 1 mile away.

Sasuke ran across to a boat, where he paddled to a large cave...

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Fourth Hokage descended through the roof, wearing the most complex set of ninja equipment that Naruto had ever seen.

"Are...are you...are you my...are you my father...are you my father sir?" Naruto stuttered.

"Naruto, I never knew that you would look like this when you grew up. Yes, I am your father," the Fourth Hokage said, zipping around Naruto .

"But, what about my mom? Why did she die, nothing happened to her, right?" Naruto asked desperately.

"She died, just a few minutes after the child birth. None of the doctors knew why. I stood, holding you, as I heard that your mother died, and it just began to sink in when I heard that the demon was approaching. It all overwhelmed me, and it was just happening so quick, all I could think was that I needed to do something to save all the people that I could.

"I dashed to the Demon, but found that it was right in front of the hospital, and it broke down the office and rampaged to the other side and as it sniffed around, it nearly hit the baby room. I thought that you were doomed, but I dashed into the way and performed the forbidden jutsu which sealed the creature inside of you. I was quickly killed by the beast after it got it's grip on me. It threw me next to you, and I looked at you in your bed, and I thought, 'You hold the beast now little one, keep it safe...' And I died there and the beast was permanently sealed inside of you."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sasuke felt as tall as an adult. He was about 6' 5" and his voice sounded like Iruka's.

"Oh...the ghost in my body...was a full grown man?" Sasuke asked himself. 'Does that mean that I have the personality of a adult?'

Sasuke flew out of the cave, but didn't expect to find the ghost guy this quickly.

"Hello Sasuke."

"Unlike the woman in Naruto's body, you actually had the sense to use a continual curse. So why were you in my body, I thought that the ghost with the most similar personality..."

"You're not mature, I am just far more immature than any one else at my age level. The sad thing is, we have similar personalities when complete opposites at everything else. Adult, kid, mature, immature, alive, dead, just about everything."

"HOW DO I REVERSE THIS CRAPPY CURSE!" Sasuke said, making a lunge for the man's neck. Sasuke's hand actually grabbed the man and moved him.

"You're a shaman!" the man asked with a scared face.

"I guess so..." Sasuke reached into his pocket again and pulled out some Kunai knifes and quickly held them up to his neck.

"It's not like you can kill me!" the man snickered at Sasuke.

"No, but I can kill him," Sasuke went down to his body and held the Kunai to his own neck. "I'll revert if I do it."

"But you'll die!" the man stared in horror that he won't get his body back.

"1...2...3!" Sasuke jabbed the kunai into his neck.

"Nooo!" the man looked at the body.

"Well, too bad you didn't know, that if I keep the wound blocked, I won't bleed to death." He then went into his body and blocked the wound. "I learned the places you won't die in a neck wound. Too bad they don't sort us by similar brains."

"RRRRR...GAH!" the man screamed into the air.

"Well, I'm off," Sasuke said as he walked away.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Wow...Father, is there anyway I can get you or mom back!" Naruto asked longingly.

"Only one way. Relife is a legend that has been hovering around worlds for ages. Many people say that when someone of strong heart or mind dies, they leave behind a spirit so powerful that it influences a newborn to become them, or have part of them inside. Actually it is a complex method of jutsus, potions and spells, and if you do it correctly, the person will return to how they looked at the last moment of their life. I can give you the scroll, but you must promise to use it only on one of us! Two would be too much of a strain on your body." the Fourth Hokage dropped a scroll on the floor, and Naruto studied it carefully.

"Okay...thank you."

"Do you think that you will be able to perform it Naruto?" Kakashi asked him.

"It'll take a few months, but yes. I will bring back my mother," Naruto said determinedly.

------------------------------one month later--------------------------------

Naruto sat on a rug, studying the scroll, when Ms. Ochitaka and Kakashi came into the room.

"Hello!" Sakura said cheerily.

"What!" Naruto said with an angry face.

"Well, because Kakashi and I have been going out for a while..."

"You have?" Naruto asked, clueless.

"Yeah..." Sakura said.

"We have decided that we are going to get married!" Ms Ochitaka finished.

"You DID!" Naruto asked, even more clueless.

"That's wonderful!"

"The ceremony will be held another week from now. We need to hold it soon, because there are so many situations which cut important things off..." she said with a laugh.

"So you guys are going to get married? When did you even start going out?" Naruto asked.

"We started going out a while ago, we thought that everyone knew..." Kakashi stared at Naruto like he was even more of an idiot.

"Well, I'm happy that you two are getting married, but I really need to practice my scroll!" Naruto said, apologetically.

"Alright, we'll leave you to study!" Kakashi said.

---------------------------------day of the marriage------------------------

Sakura was chosen to be the bride's maid, and Sasuke was the best man.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today, to witness..." the priest began.

"Wow, I can't beleive how fast today came!" Emi whispered to Naruto in the pews.

"Yeah, I mean it seemed like only yesterday they told us that it was happening," Naruto whispered back.

"Well, they really do look nice together huh?" Emi whispered, looking at Mrs. Ochitaka and Kakashi, gazing at each other, both faces partially hidden because of veils and masks.

"I never thought that I'd actually talk or think about something like this, but yes, they do look nice..." Naruto smiled.

"Do you, Kakashi, take this woman, Sayaka, to be you lawfully wedded wife?" the preist asked.

Kakashi looked at Ms. Ochitaka, and replied, "I do."

"Do you, Sayaka, take this man, Kakashi, to be your lawfully wedded husband?" the priest asked. (A/N: I think those are the vows... you can review if I'm wrong!)

"I do," she replied, looking back at the priest.

"Then, by the power vested in me, I now pronounce you man, and wife!" the priest announced. "You may kiss the bride!"

Kakashi hugged her close to him and gave her a long kiss.

The crowd in the pews began to applaud as Kakashi led Mrs. Ochitaka towards the cake.

"Would you like the honors honey?" Kakashi held the knife to her.

"Okay," she smiled. She held the knife above the cake, and she let the knife glide through the beautiful wedding cake.

"Kakashi!" Naruto came up. "Look at the doll things on the top!"

Kakashi grabbed his, and saw a hole where his hair was supposed to be.

"They're little cups! I made the whole thing, all by myself!" Naruto held out his hands which had a bunch of band-aids on them.

"Thanks Naruto. Everyone, let's eat!" Kakashi stepped aside as everyone formed a line along the table to the cake.

Everyone was crouded around the table as Naruto, Emi and the newlyweds stood in their own bunch. Kakashi suddenly reached for his concealed eye.

"Auugh!" Kakashi pulled off his mask and used the plate as a mirror.

"Kakashi! Your eye..." Sayaka said, gently touching his face. His eye was a flaming blue, which seemed to be emitting a strange chakra aura.

"Something bad is going to happen soon...worse than the fox demon..." Kakashi said with a pale face.

---------------------------------three months later--------------------------

"Kakashi, I think that I've got the scroll down, I know the ceremony, everything!" Naruto said with a smile.

"Well, I'm going to be finding a oversoul so that I can join the shaman fight!" Sasuke said camly.

"What if they don't let you in?" Naruto asked.

"I'll...persuade them," Sasuke laughed.

"Well...as long as we are on the subject of good news..." Mrs. Ochitaka came in holding her stomach. "I am going to be having a baby..." she smiled to Kakashi.

"Mrs. Ochitaka...you and Kakashi are...having a...baby?" Naruto stuttered.

"Yes! And I guess I should have said babies. It's twins!" Mrs. Ochitaka walked up to Kakashi and hugged him close to her.

"It's amazing...I'm going to be a father. I'm going to have kids. I...I'm going to have a son..." Kakashi was naming things to be happy about.

"Mrs. Ochitaka, congratulations!" Sakura said, clapping her hands together.

"Good for you Mrs. Ochitaka," Sasuke said, in his normal boring tone.

"Wow! That's amazing! Does that mean I'm going to be a cousin? Or maybe an uncle! I'm gonna be a cousin twice removed!" Naruto laughed and wondered about how many things he'd be.

"Do you know what gender they are?" Sakura asked, looking at Mrs. Ochitaka's stomach.

"We do not know yet, it is much too soon," Mrs. Ochitaka said.

"What about names? What are you gonna call 'em if they're boys? Boy and a girl? Girl and a girl!" Naruto asked hopping up and down.

"We do not quite know...Kakashi, what do you want to name them?"

"I'm gonna be... I don't know...I guess there are some things that we'll have to think about..."

"Yes, but I like the name Takashi...it's common, but I like it..." she smiled.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Finally. I know the perfect people to test my power on..." a man shrouded in the darkness of the night sky smiled. "Don't you agree on my picking Person?"

"WHAT DO YOU THINK! I think they look great! Unless... sniff you're wrong..." Person said angrily, happily, then sadly. "Oh...lovely job Mathan!" he said cuddling up to him.

"Excellent...

----------------------------the next day-------------------------------------

"Everyone!" Mathan appeared in front of the ninja bunch and Yoh bunch. "I would like to announce my power, then unleash it on you! My name is Mathan, my power multiplies peoples' present emotion by ten. And my friend, Person, he changes a person's personality and their emotion."

"SHIT-HEADS, YOU BETTER BELEIVE IT! But if you don't I don't mind! Although, most people don't...sniff And I just LOVE having my power...and you for that matter..." he spun around Mathan's body like a snake.

"WHOA! He has like no bones!" Naruto said as he looked at Person. He was literally wrapping himself around Mathan.

"What are you doing!" Sakura asked, worried what the answer might be.

"When we combine our powers, we are undefeatable, and yes, blond boy is completely wrong, he has all his bones."

"H...how does have bones, but he slithers like a snake?" Naruto said, grossed out.

"His bones have been imploded, and they are about as thin as fingernails."

"Okay then, how does that support his body?"

"Must we ask so many questions? Let us continue..." Mathan did a confusing number of justus and everyone suddenly felt packed to explosion with emotion.

"He's a ninja, and now it's not exciting..." Kakashi said quickly.

"Sasuke...I love you so much..." Sakura ran over to Sasuke and she went to kiss him when...

"ITACHI!" Sasuke yelled. "YOU'RE GONNA DIE YOU JERK, DIE DIE DIE!"

"Everyone...no one...hatred...no..." Naruto just fell over on the ground and began to mumble.

Kakashi began plucking grass blades and using them as instruments. (A/N: This is possible, just so you know...) He quickly threw them away and went to poke Naruto. He continued leaving and going to something or someone else.

"Sasuke..." Sakura began kissing Sasuke, but Kakashi came and said, "Interesting...boring..." and Sakura quickly pulled away.

"This is almost funny! ... . ...No, it is funny!" Mathan stared and laughed. "Let's change the personalities. Make it even stronger...but not the gray one, he's already good enough."

"FINE! I'd be happy to! But, what if I mess up somehow? I'd love to try anyway..." and Person did a jutsu and an incantation.

Sasuke's eyes then seemed to strain as he went pale and grabbed a kunai knife and ran over to Kakashi.

"DIE ITACHI YOU MOTHER #$& $&!" Sasuke yelled.

"Sigh Sasuke...Sasuke..." Sakura just repeated this until she began taking off her clothes and rubbing close to Sasuke.

Something then happened to Sasuke and he had returned to normal! As he looked at Naruto, he was clenching his head as if a bear was coming.

"He's gone...they're all dead...me...no one else..uhhhhnnnnn, he died..." Naruto clenched his head even harder.

'It seemed that something unusual woke me up so...' Sasuke thought to himself. "Naruto you BETTER watch this."

Sasuke then looked at Sakura who was still dressless...but not naked to make you perverts out there know! Sasuke hugged Sakura and gave her a long kiss.

"Sasuke...Sasuke!" Sakura stared at him like he was crazy. "You kissed me...why did you kiss me? I thought..." Sakura began to think hard about this subject, as she slipped her dress back up with a blushed face.

"I need to wake Naruto up! But, as you can see, he's still cringing on the floor! We need to do something more extreme than that..."

"SAAUKE!" Sakura said with a scared face.

"Not that...Kakashi...I have something intresting for you..." Kakashi dashed over. Sasuke grabbed his head and kissed Kakashi.

"Wah...HAHHAHAHHA! OMIGOSHTHATWASSOFREAKINFUNNYAND.." Naruto looked at Sakura as she was still slipping on the sleeve of the dress, Sasuke who was kissing Kakashi, and Kakashi who was muffling, "Impresting...boring..." Naruto scratched head and asked, "Did I miss something?"

"REDO THE SPELL! Pretty please?" Person asked.

"Okay!" Mathan began doing some more jutsus, but Sasuke appeared by him and quickly rammed a Kunai knife through Mathan's hands.

"Ack!" he tried pulling out the knife with his mouth but Sasuke uppercutted him back onto the ground.

"How do you know justsus!" Naruto asked stomping his foot on Mathan's chest. "Answer!" he stomped again.

"Ow...I...I'm from the...village...of...urk..." Mathan fell asleep right there.

-----------------------------------time gapalapa----------------------------

"So you're from the village of the leaves?" Emi asked.

"Do you even know where that is?" Sasuke asked her.

"No..."

"Yes...I'm from the village of the leaves..." Mathan said, butting in.

"Okay...how did you get here?" Sasuke asked him.

"Some man from a mysterious glowing portal, we were fighting, but then he made a portal and grabbed me and Person in..." Mathan replied, rubbing his chin from the uppercut.

"Hmmm...Dejavu much?" Naruto asked sarcastically.

"Mathan...we got here the exact same way..." Sasuke began to think.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Author Note

This is going to be a very long, probably badly written chapter. My internet access is being a pain in the butt, so I'm posting all this at once. See ya!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Naruto was standing in a circle with markings and strange figures. He poured a white concoction onto the word in the middle and did the clone jutsu. The doppleganger the lay down and Naruto jabbed a knife into it's back and said an incantation. The clone dissolved and left a blue powder which Naruto picked up and wrote the letter covered by the white potion in the puddle of white potion.

A woman's figure descended through the roof, but the figure had no features.

Naruto took a deep breath and punched the ground, which made the skin on his hand tear. Naruto winced but then a blue aura began floating to the body.

"Kakashi, what's he doing?" Sakura asked.

"He's pushing his chakra into the body in order to give it strength. If he tried to complete the body without soing this, the body would have no muscle, or mind."

Naruto then got another potion which looked like his chakra arura and then poured it over a candle which turned it purple. The purple candle then made white smoke which flowed into the body which appeared to give it bones. He then cut himself and dripped the blood into the white potion, and then took a hair off of his head and put that into the white potion, and he then scratched off a small portion of skin which he put into the potion. About three faces flashed across the head of the body when it stopped, the body emitted a white light and gently fell to the ground. Naruto quickly looked away, as he noticed that in past experiences, people seem to end up in bad situations.

Naruto held out some clothes that Ms. Ochitaka lent to him.

"Th- thank you...Okay you can look now..." Naruto slowly turned around.

"M...mom?" Naruto asked.

"I...I don't know..." she said rubbing her head.

"My name is Naruto!" Naruto said hopefully.

"N...Naruto? Uzumaki? Uzumaki Naruto?" she said, slowly remembering the name.

"Yes! Yes Uzumaki Naruto!" Naruto repeated.

"Well...you've grown up well..." she said happily.

"What's your name?" Kakashi asked.

"My name is Maki. Naruto, how did you get me back?" She asked, looking at herself.

"I performed the Relife ritual..." Naruto said, starting to feel exhausted.

"Are you ok! I'm surprised that you even made it through the chakra release!" She asked hugging him close to her.

"Ms. Uzumaki?" Sakura peered. She saw Naruto collapsed on the ground and rushed over. "What on earth happened to him?"

"He got worn out from the ritual," She said, seeing if he could sit up...he fell.

"Naruto!" Emi came into the room and ran to him. She picked him up and the she saw the strange, brown haired woman.

"Who are you?" she asked, looking at her.

"I'm Naruto's girfriend, Emi, and who are you?" she replied.

"I'm his mom, Maki..." they both looked at each other.

"But I thought that Naruto's mom died..." Emi said, starting to get confused.

"He performed a Relife ritual which brought me back," She said.

"Emim...Emi?" Naruto asked, waking up.

"Oh Naruto!" Emi kissed him and then asked, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah...I'm tired though..." Naruto said, sitting up but still leaning on Emi.

"Naruto, don't try to bring your father back..." Maki began.

"It'll be too much of a strain on my body, dad told me..." Naruto finished.

"Naruto, come to your bed, you need some rest!" Emi picked him up, but she quickly found out the she needed to drag him across the floor. She dragged him to the couch and set him down on it.

"Naruto...you need to lose some weight!" Emi said, stretching out her arms.

"So, you're Naruto's girlfriend?" she said, looking at her like a criminal.

"Yeah. Why are you so shocked?" Emi asked.

"I just wish Naruto introduced me," Maki replied.

Well, they continued comment and argue, but all was eventually resolved.

---------------------------------a long time later...-----------------------

We zoom in to see Naruto showing Emi a few jutsus.

"And so, when you make the sign here..." Naruto showed her a sign. "...yyoouu ccaann mmaakkee aa ccooppyy ooff yourself." the other Naruto was off time.

"So like...this?" Emi did the same and her first doppelganger looked like Naruto's first did. "What did I do wrong?" she sat down grumpily.

"You're twisting your finger, you need to just turn and slide them!" Naruto showed her the proper hand signs.

"Alright, look!" Emi did the jutsu, but this time her doppleganger came out better. "Naruto! I did it! I made the copy!"

"Good job!" Naruto kissed Emi on the cheek.

Naruto continued teaching her other things, such as the proper kunai throwing technique.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Listen, kid, it's too late to let you into the Shaman Fight!" Silva said.

"What if I can beat you?" Sasuke said with an attitude.

"Alright, If you can beat me. But, you have to beat me with all of my power. I will not hold back," Silva said seriously.

"Fine then! I'm ready," Sasuke said.

The area arround them suddenly changed to a place which looked like a giant light brown cereal bowl.

"Where is this?" Sasuke asked, looking around.

"Namenta Bowl. It's a giant bowl made entirely out of dried natural cement," Silva said.

"Alright then, let's fight..."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

We go to the hospital to see Kakashi sitting next to one of the beds.

"So, when did the doctor say the babies would come?" Kakashi asked.

"They should arrive in a week..." Mrs. Ochitaka said.

"Alright, well I'm going to get a soda. I'll be right back!"

"Kakashi! You already had six!" she quickly replied.

Kakashi hand was vibrating like a speedboat engine. "Yeah, but I need to stay awake..." even Kakashi's eye was seeming to vibrate.

"What for? The babies are not going to be here for another week!" she laughed.

"But, you might need something, you might get hurt or something..." Kakashi was now going around the room picking up the empty soda cans and throwing them - and missing - into the trash.

"How would I get hurt?" she asked, looking at him funny. "Kakashi I'm as excited about the baby as you are, but you need to rest! You'll have to do something other than sit by me for another week!" Sayaka said.

"Fine...I'll go to my restaurant!" Kakashi said, pointing his finger at the air.

"Ahem!" she cleared her throat loudly.

"I'll go get some rest..." he said playfully.

"Thank you," she said as she blew him a kiss goodbye.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cue the dramatic music! We zoom in to see a Silva on the floor.

'He has incredible power!' Silva thought as he looked up at Sasuke. (A/N: I'm sorry, I didn't write the battle scene 'cause I forgot Silva's powers! I know silver wing, shield, horn...tail?)

"So are you going to let me in?" Sasuke asked, poking a giant sword into Silva's leg.

"Uuuhhh..." the bison on his leg said.

"Fine," Silva brought them back to find Sakura and everyone in the living room.

"Hi Silva!" Yoh said with a wave.

"Sasuke, just out of curiosity, why are you going into the shaman fight?" Sakura asked, knowing Sasuke's normal attitude about things like this.

"Ultimate power...I can finally kill Itachi..." Sasuke clenched his fist.

"Oh, well isn't that nice..." Sakura faked a little laugh.

Sasuke then set down his giant sword and a tall looking ghost came out.

"No way..." Sakura said, backing up.

"Oh, it's the rest of Kakashi's little group..." Zabuza's ghost came into sight.

"But Sas- but he- Kakashi- EEK!" Sakura slowly stuttered.

"It's okay, I have a specific reason for joining up with him. If he wins, I can finally come back to life."

"I'm going to let him, because I need his power for something like this."

"So how'd you get his sword?" Sakura asked.

"Kakashi's been keeping it for ages for some odd reason," Sasuke said, sitting down on the couch where Kakashi wasn't sleeping.

dododododo

Kakashi jumped out of the couch and sat up straight.

"What was ut?" Kakashi asked rubbing sleep from his eye.

dododododo

"Uhhn. Hello?" Kakashi answered the phone. "It is...he is? THEY ARE!" Kakashi quickly shot off of the couch. "All right! I'll - I'll be right over!" Kakashi put back down the phone as he began to run out of the house.

"What, what is it?" Sakura asked, pulling Kakashi's shirt.

"The babies are coming, right now!" Kakashi pulled himself away from Sakura. He disappeared in a tornado of dust and appeared at the hospital entrance. He quickly ran inside and came into the room where they were being born.

"Huff...huff...Ka...Kashi...wait.. for us..." Sakura fell next to Kakashi.

"Sir, can you wait outside? Normally, the husbands don't like watching because..." the nurse began explaining.

"I need to support my wife!" Kakashi said. He went to the side of her and began to tell her things.

Sakura left the room to find Sasuke and Naruto and Emi there.

"Is Kakashi okay?" Emi asked Sakura.

"Yeah, but his hair seems to be grayer than ever," she replied.

"I sure hope the babies are going to be healthy," Emi sat down on one of the benches.

"Me too..."

----------------------------------------time gapses--------------------------

Kakashi came of the room and sat down on the bench next to the others.

"So how are the babies, are they healthy, are they boys, boy and a girl, girl and a girl!" Naruto asked again.

"It's a girl and a boy," Kakashi let out a sigh.

"So why do you sound so bummed out? You just became a father!" Sakura said to him.

"I'm happy, and yes, I am a father, it's just I'm tired, and Sayaka's so tired..." Kakashi stretched.

"I think you're tired, let's go," Naruto said, and motioned to everyone to help him pick up Kakashi.

Naruto was driving to the house when Sakura asked him. "Naruto...do you even have your driver's license!" Sakura asked nervously.

"No," he replied calmly.

They arrived back at the house and they waited for a long while when Sayaka came in holding two bundles of blankets.

"Honey! Let me help you with one..." Kakashi ran over and grabbed one of the babies. "So what are we going to name the girl?"

"I was thinking of Aya, or Arisa...what do you like Kakashi?" she asked, gently bouncing the girl up and down.

"I like Aya," Kakashi said with a nod.

"Takashi and Aya...I wonder if they'll get along," Sayaka said.

"Don't worry, I'm sure they'll be fine, they're twins, and siblings, they'd have to get along, right?" Kakashi thought.

-------------------------------------many years later------------------------

"Kakashi, listen, we need to start making progress on getting back to our own time. I think that -" Naruto came up to Kakashi.

"I know, beleive it or not I've been making some progress! In fact, I've found out that SEVEN more groups of shinobi have been taken to this realm! Someone is trying to gather them here..." Kakashi picked up some papers and showed them to Naruto. "These are the ones that have been taken."

"What! Gaara even got taken!" Naruto yelled, snatching the papers out of Kakashi's hands.

"Who's Gaara?" A boy came up to Naruto.

"It's a someone from back home, Takashi," Naruto told him.

"Hey! Aya! Dad said that other Shinobi are being kidnapped!" Takashi called over to his sister.

"But, we need to find out who did this and quickly. If they continue, they might get to reach their goal..." Kakashi said.

"Which is...?" Naruto asked, expecting an answer.

"I...don't know..." Kakashi said with a sigh.

"Well, we need to find this guy and stop him! And by we, I mean you!" Naruto smiled.

"Expectedly so...But I know this much...he's from no village, and his next target...is the Hokage."

"What! How do you know? Are you sure?" Naruto asked, surprised.

"Yes, I noticed that when we were fighting him, he had no headband. And I know his next target is Hokage, because so far, he has been going in a specific order..." Kakashi wrote something down on one of the papers.

"Dad, How do you do the Doppleganger jutsu?" Aya came up tugging on his sleeve.

"Yes, just a second. So we need to find out where his next portal is going to be, if we find it, we will be able to go back to our own dimension/world!" Kakashi said.

"But then how're we gonna get back?" Naruto asked him.

"Well, we won't."

"Oh, so Emi and the others are coming with us," Naruto laughed.

"...No...they can never come to our dimension..." Kakashi said sadly.

"But what about Emi! Sayaka! Your kids! We can't leave them behind!" Naruto asked.

"Listen...Naruto, if we take them to our dimension, the world will be thrown out of order...some sacrifices need to be made," Kakashi said.

"HOW CAN YOU SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT!" Naruto grabbed Kakashi's neck. He looked at his hand and quickly let go. "Kakashi Sensei..."

"It's ok...I understand how you feel...I feel the same way, but they're too different to be in our world!" Kakashi said. He saw Naruto's face. "Naruto...I love Sayaka as much as you love Emi, but we just can't bring someone to a different dimension!"

"Then how come we didn't destroy this world! How come only they will...wait...Kakashi, we didn't ruin this world...so maybe...maybe we aren't dealing with different dimensions, and maybe we're dealing...with different time?" Naruto asked hopefully.

"It's easily possible, but the likelyness is just...I mean look how different our worlds are!"

"So that means that we can take them with us if it's time travel?" Naruto asked, knowing the answer.

"Yes, but only for a little while at a time, we don't want things to change here either!" Kakashi said, knowing the happiness that he concealed.

"Dad, how's it go?" Aya asked, beginning to stick out a puppy lip.

"Shadow jutsu, or clone?" Kakashi asked her.

"Ummm...the real one!"Aya said happily.

"All right Aya...do this..."

"This..."

"...Do this..."

"This..."

"...then this!" Kakashi finished.

"Then this?" as a clone of her appeared, she asked it to play a game.

"Okay, that should keep her busy for a while. Now Naruto I need to go ask Mathan some questions, so keep an eye on the kids please," Kakashi said as he left.

"Oh sure, I don't mind, I have no plans..." Naruto grumbled.

"Naruto! Naruto!" Naruto heard Emi's voice call.

"I'm in here!" he shouted back.

"Naruto? What are you doing, I thought that we were going on a date tonight. To the Utada Hikaru concert!" Emi waved an unbroken glowstick.

"We are! Just a second..." Naruto did a jutsu as a clone appeared next to him. "Now Emi, do the jutsu that I show you!"

"Alright...What's different about this jutsu and the clone jutsu?" Emi asked.

"I used a combination of the clone jutsu and Mathan's jutsu to give them our personalities!" Naruto said proudly.

Naruto asked the clones a series of questions to be sure they were like them.

"Alright! Let's go Emi! Do you have everything we'll need?" Naruto asked, hopping over the small fence.

"Yep: KitKats, because of extremely high prices at the concert, Pepsi, for the same reason, and jackets for the night-time portion!" Emi said, giving a bag to Naruto and also hopping the fence.

"Today, we witness the never before heard song! Kazyuma da Hentai(Kazyuma the Pervert not a real song)! Let's go!" Naruto yelled, pointing along the street.

"...Wrong way..." Emi said, smacking her forehead.

As Naruto left for the concert, the clones sat down and began talking.

"This concert is gonna rock! Huh...get it? Rock?" Naruto laughed.

"Let's just go..." Emi said, hugging Naruto.

As they ran off into the distance...

"Such...a shame...So young, with such...a horrible...demise..." a man sitting in a wheel chair said sadly.

--------------------------------------time gappo-----------------------------

"EMI! THIS CONCERT ROCKS, HUH!" Naruto screamed over the crowd.

"YEAH!" Emi shouted back.

They then saw a black figure standing atop the metal section on the stage.

"Emi, I'm gonna go up there. Enjoy the concert," Naruto disappeared in a puff of smoke. The people behind stared at Emi for a while.

"Hey, hey you!" Naruto yelled to them.

"N...Naruto!" They asked.

A hand came up and pulled back the hood...

"Hinata? How did you get here? Why are you here at this concert?" Naruto asked, completely clueless once again.

"Some guy, he pulled me and the others through a strange portal...I'm here because I was stealing food from backstage...why are you here?" Hinata asked him.

"Same thing. You were stealing food? Well, I was on a date when I saw you up here," Naruto said, looking down at Utada.

"A...a date?" she asked sadly.

"Yeah. Well, I need to go!" Naruto said, once again clueless.

He jumped down onto the stage and landed with a thud. Everything stopped.

"Who are you!" she asked, staring at him.

Naruto yanked the microphone away from her. "Hello, everyone...I am Naruto, and I came from the ceiling! Continue," Naruto laughed and jumped of the stage. The music didn't continue for a while.

"Naruto! What the heck were you thinking!" Emi asked with wide eyes.

"I stole the spotlight!" Naruto said with a wide smile.

"Yeah, and the microphone and the title of town fool!" Emi said.

"Yep, and now it's where it belongs! Come on, let's just enjoy the rest of the concert," they both laughed and continued dancing.

---------------------------------time gappe----------------------------------

"You actually met Hinata here? Alright, I think I know what's happening!"

"What Kakashi!" Naruto asked, hoping for a good answer.

"He intends to take over the villages by taking away their most precious fighters, I have no clue how far he has or is going to get."

"So we need to stop him?" Naruto asked blankly.

"Yes..." Kakashi said, slapping Naruto.

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I finally have access so here you are, please review: D


	9. Help, I need Hinata, Help, not just

Umm...I don't know what to say at the moment but R & R!

Not very imaginitive...

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"Naruto, we need to enlist the help of every shinobi we can find..." Kakashi said to Naruto.

"And?...!" Naruto asked

"We know where Hinata, Kiba, and Rock are...but other than that, no one."

"Okay, let's go down the list," Hinata had been discovered undercover as some dude at a the British Pub in the city.

--------------------------------------time gap-------------------------------

Naruto stood outside of the pub and turned himself into an attracting girl. As she stepped inside, she walked all the way in rolled her hips. Several cat calls sounded out as she flicked back her hair. She approached the group of men that Hinata was with and Hinata saw the fact that it was Naruto and vice versa. Hinata was the only one that didn't have a Kool hanging out of her mouth.

"Hey, how about a hand or two boys?" Naruto asked, sitting next to them.

"Okay, and how about we make it interesting on your account?" one of the men asked.

"Alright, so then, what's your definition of, 'interesting'?" Naruto asked him.

"Well...here, we call interesting, strip poker!" he chuckled to him and the others.

"Fine! I can beat anyone at poker!" Naruto swiped up her cards.

A FEW HANDS LATER...

Naruto was sitting ther in nothing but a bra and underwear...

"ROYAL FLUSH!" the man smacked down his cards and looked at Naruto.

Naruto slipped off her bra and tossed it behind her, with bunches of men attempting to catch it.

"One last twist! And because I've beaten you every other time, you have to agree... if I win, you have to take off the rest, but then you have to run outside and yell, 'howdee-doodee'!" he laughed. He then looked at Naruto for her terms.

'Freaking idiotic...' Naruto thought. "Alright, and if I win, then you have to drink 50 shot glasses of Vodka in 30 seconds. And if you don't, you'll have to retry...every...single...time!" Naruto glared back.

"Okay. Spades are wild."

"Trade two..." Naruto handed two to him and he handed back two others. "OH YEAH! TAKE THAT! BOOM BABY!" Naruto yelled.

"..." the man looked at his cards and saw that he had nothing compared to what he thought Naruto had and so he set down his cards and said, "Alright...I hate to do this...especially at the stakes...but I fold..."

"Good, I was hoping you would do that!"

"WHY?" the man asked glaring at her.

"I had nothing too," Naruto showed his hand which was a Ace, 3, 5, 8, and 10 all of diamonds. "Alright, I'll be getting my clothes back..." Naruto snatched them back and slipped them on. "Perverts..."

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"Yoh, whatever happened to Horo-Horo?" Anna asked Yoh.

"I think he had to go to this place called "India" for the shaman fight," Yoh replied, as he began a game of darts.

"So Yoh, do you think he won?"

"I don't see why not, he's a strong guy."

"Well, I just found your shaman timer/announcer/everything, and it says that your next fight is in...Lundahn?" She asked, reading the pronunciation.

"London! I have a friend in London, he used to know me from kindergarten! He also had a bit of a sixth sense," Yoh smiled as he accidentally threw the dart out the window.

"Hey Yoh!"

Yoh looked out the window as he saw Manta pulling a dart out of his leg.

"Sorry! Playing a game!" He held up the darts and pulled his head back in quickly.

"You know I wonder if you'll have to go against Sasuke. Do you think so?" Anna asked with a swing of her beads.

"Oh, probably not, he probably won't even get a chance, he's way too far behind everyone else. He'd have to beat everyone he faces, and even then, he'd never accumulate the wins I have," Yoh said proudly.

"I'll take that as a no."

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Hinata sat at the pub talking to the other guys. She picked up an Ace of diamonds and looked carefully. Inscribed on the back she saw, "We need aid in battle. Meet at Otubei Ln. 19362." Hinata set down the ace and left the bar.

She approached the quiet looking house, only to see everyone arguing.

"Ah, hello Hinata, good thing you arrived!" Kakashi sighed.

"I thought Naruto said there was battle?" Hinata asked quietly.

"Well, there is, but we can't go to it, because the way this is starting to look, this man, whoever it is, is more powerful than the Hokage. In fact, this seems to be something he already knows. He appears to have the need to take over this land that used to be ours," Naruto said.

"Whoever this man is...it will take more than force and mind to take him down," Kakashi said, burying his face in the shadow. (A/N: Simply for dramatic effect.)

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You'll kinda laugh your asses off at this next chapter, because the bad guy kinda starts off a little...funny.


	10. Everybody was KungFu fighting!

R & R!

Once again, not very imaginitive...

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Naruto went around, enlisting the help of the other shinobi. Some more reluctantly than others, but they still came.

"Okay everyone...I'm glad to see that you came. We need to find the wormhole that leads to our village! W-Where's Sasuke?!" Naruto yelled.

"He said something about a fight in America," Kakashi said, reading Make-Out Paradise.

"Rrgh...well, we just need to keep a constant watch over the city. Kakashi will be making a portal that should lead to the city back home. If someone finds it, call everyone with these," Naruto handed out walkie talkies.

"What if the portal closes?" Hinata asked.

"Use your chakra to keep it open. It should give us all enough time to get there and through."

"What if it's the wrong one?"

"Use your chakra to keep it open ande take a peek through! Go back if it's the wrong one!" Naruto nodded.

'Wow..Naruto thought this through so well!' Hinata thought.

"Any questions? Good. Hinata, you're at point A, and..." Naruto read off a list of names and points. "So, we're ready now? Let's go!"

They reported to their assigned points and Naruto thought... 'I sure hope that what I taught Emi has paid off...'

"Demon Fox to team, Demon fox to team, Kakashi will be generating a wormhole. Keep your eyes out for the tiniest hint of a portal, over!"

"Demon Fox? What's with the stupid nicknames?"

"Hey, shut up Dog Breath!"

"Who the squeaky gave me that squeakyen name?!" he growled.

"Found it! Outside the marketplace!" Emi fizzled over bad signal.

"Ozayzzzbezzrightzzzzthere!" Naruto barely came through. "Keepzzzzzzzzzportal!"

"I think I know what he means," she jumped over to the portal and made it big enough for everyone else to get through.

They all walked through and emerged into a naked forest.

"Wh-what happened to all the leaves? What is this ground...I've never seen this kind of surface. Only this portion of the forest is burnt up," Kakashi looked around.

"Everyone! Head towards the village, or else we may not find it..." Emi said.

"What do you mean? It's not like he could have moved the village!" Naruto raised an eyebrow.

"No, but from what I learned from Kakashi, he can move us away from us. Move the tip of a compass, teleport us through the village without us knowing, and if he's as strong as Kakashi says, kill us," Emi said seriously.

"Alright, well let's transform into something...peaceful. I know what I'll be!" Naruto nodded.

Everyone changed into an animal of some sort and ran into the woods. The village came into view and they emerged to a completely empty scene.

Kiba changed back. "What the heck is going on?! No bad guys, no fighting, where's the-"

A kunai shot through his arm and dragged him with indescribable force. It took him a few feet and pinned his arm to the tree.

"Hm. Any other animal friends, Mr. Dolittle? Ah, hello there..." his foot moved quickly and launched a ferret which turned back into Hinata. He threw more kunai which nailed her feet into the ground. His foot raised and was few inches away from crushing a lizard. Just before impact, Naruto changed back and launched the enemy.

"Nobody is gonna crush me! Uzumaki Naruto, the future Hokage!" he held out his fist. Emi became human and attempted to release her captured friends, she pulled back her hands in pain.

"What did you do to those kunai?" Emi asked the man.

"I left behind traces of chakra in order to give them power and to slowly electrecute your friends. I assume you are wondering, so here...bow down to me, Sentinel, your future ruler!"

"Emi?" Naruto glanced over.

"Let's do it!" she nodded back. The grabbed each others' elbows and ran toward Sentinel. They wrapped around a log which took his place.

"Do plan two!" they turned around and shot the log back in his face. he unfortuantely caught it and dashed towards them.

"Very good control of your body..." he wrapped them back around the log and speared their arms through each others' and the log. "...but lack of your mind. It get's easier to pin ya every time. Looks like the only real competition is going to be Kakashi!"

Naruto tried to move, but the small electric shock got much stronger. Emi clenched her arm.

"If you move, you're just torturing your friend! Good luck escaping! Mahahahaha!" Naruto clenched his arm and ripped it off of the spike.

"Just a second Emi!" Sentinel still didn't notice that Naruto got free. He grabbed onto the spike and took away some of the chroma of it.

"Naruto, what are you doing?" she whispered. "Wait...This isn't hurting me! Naruto stop! You're gonna kill yourself!"

"I don't care. This jackass is gonna die! All his chakra is in me. It hurts, but it's more energy I can spend!" the spike released and Naruto flung it around back at Sentinel.

"You're very skilled little Hokage. Ha! If you honestly want to be Hokage you'll have to train for a few more years. Say, 30, maybe 40 years!" he caught it and crushed it in his palm. Naruto ran over to the pinned fown ninjas and attempted to do the same to their items of capturism. (A/N: Not a real word, is it?)

"I don't think so," he grabbed Naruto by the neck. "...one of you is annoying enough! I can't imagine any more."

"Hey Sensiless! Are you just gonna babble on or actually fight one of us?!" Kiba pulled on his hand, cringing.

"Don't make me angry, I'm much more powerful than any of you would really think," Sentinel glared at Kiba. Naruto by then was near passing out from lack of oxygen.

"Let..." Emi made a handsign. "...go..." did a quick routine of more signs. "...of my boyfriend!!!" Vines sprouted out of her body.

"That's so much creepier than BugBoy Shino's anthill of a body..." Kiba grimaced.

"What kind of move is that?" Senitinel looked at the hand signals in his head. "A combonation of the hiding technique...and utilization of trees in your towns variety of attacks."

"Hey man, it's not my town, just my move!" she poofed up behind and wrapped a large entanglement of vines around him.

Sentinel maintained his hold of Naruto and tightened his grip. Naruto's body relaxed, and Sentinel released his grip.

"You...bastard!!!!" Emi pulled kunai out of her pouch using the vines. She began cutting at Sentinel.

"Easy, easy, You'll be the same place as him soon enough!" Sentinel released a charge of chakra. "Now..."

All of a sudden, a kick blasted out of nowhere...

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Cliffie...who? Sasuke is in America...all the other ninjas haven't really been located yet. My first cliffie in a while, right? Well, I will type my fingers as fast as I can.


	11. Those cats were fast as Lightning!

This is the chapter where you'll laugh at the bad guy!

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"Who?!" Sentinel asked as he fell.

"Nobody, NOBODY, kills our friend!" Yoh said dramatically. Behind him, Anna and the others were all there.

"A...Amidamaru!" Sentinel looked in awe. "You are one of my idols!"

"What?!" Amidamaru backed away slowly.

"You were the greatest samurai in all of history!"

"See Kakashi, I told you that this was the past not a different dimension!" Naruto pointed!

"Naruto! I thought you were dead!" Emi hugged him.

"I had to act...Nothing says I wasn't close though!" Naruto kissed her head. Emi hit him.

"Don't you dare scare me like that! I thought I lost you...I'd never get to see you again..."

"Hope I'm not interupting!" Sentinel knocked them away.

"Let's go Master Yoh!" Amidamaru nodded. Yoh grabbed a kunai and ran up towards Sentinel.

"So Hinata, are you enjoying being slowly electrecuted? I am!" Kiba said sarcastically.

"Naruto's doing his best!" Hinata glared at him.

"Yoh, why did you come? I thought you all didn't even know about this...m...mom?! Why are you fighting?" Naruto gazed in awe.

"You think I wasn't a shinobi when I was alive? I was the best at the academy!"

While everyone was talking, they didn't know that Sentinel was making his move.

"Are you all getting lazy?" Sentinel grabbed Naruto and Emi again. "This is so easy! Killing kids isn't right, or good on guilt record, but it takes care of the annoyance. Here's a two for one coupon!!!" He grabbed a near signpost off the streets and impaled both of them on it. "How many times do I have to kill you, you annoying...little...brat!!!"

Sentinel kicked them away. "You..will never do that to a minor!" Maki elbowed Sentinel to the face. "Especially WHACK not WHACK my WHACK son!" CRUNCH

"Time for the finisher..." Amidamaru concentrated for a second...his eyes snapped to a specific vital spot and dashed forward. Few seconds later, and Sentinel was down on the ground. with a large slash slicing a section of his body open.

"Nro...naro! Naruo!" a voice fluttered in his head... 'Mom? I'm so relaxed. I feel so peaceful. All my muscles are so...opposite of tense. I feel like I'm flying...what? Something on my chest? It's warm...'

"sniff Naruto...wake up! I know you're not dead! YOU AREN'T DEAD!" Emi cried on his chest.

"I'm too tired. I won't wake up...But can you take the pole out my chest?" he whispered.

"You're alive!" Emi kissed him. "I've got the pole for you..."

"No, don't take it out! We need to wait until the wound partially seals, or else he'll bleed to death!" Kakashi quickly grabbed her hand.

"You haven't even...seen the...boss." Sentinel said with a dying breath.

"Where is the boss? Talk! Agh. He had to die right now..." Kiba growled.

"At this rate, the boss probably made it to Hokage already. Let's get rolling!" Kakashi pointed to the direction of Hokage.

Everyone headed away except Maki. "Emi, I want you to stay here and watch after Naruto."

"What? Are you sure you don't want someone more skilled?" Emi asked her.

"Emi...anyone who cares about my boy as much as you do is skilled enough to watch over him. Just make sure he doesn't try to follow us," Maki smiled.

"You can count on me!" Maki then followed the rest of the group over to the large building where the Hokage usually was.

"Emi...I think the wound is sealed up now. Can you please take out the pole?" Naruto whispered to her.

"No Naruto, you're still bleeding, and if anything happens it'll be me bandaging your other wounds!" Emi laughed.

"Awww. No fun for me..." he chuckled.

"Oh, the others are having fun for you. Sorry!" she touched one of his open wounds.

"Don't worry. I'll have fun talking to you..." Naruto smiled.

Ooooooooooooooooooooooh snap! Kakashi and the others...

"Wait up Kakashi!" Sakura panted.

"No, we need to get there before 'the boss' does!" Kakashi was sprinting as fast as he could. (close to a jaguar no doubt! doncha think?)

They dawned upon the old building and saw no present form of chaos...but once inside they saw guards who were heavily armed. "We need to find out where Lord Hokage is..." Kakashi looked around. "Try to find a safe way up the stairs!" he commanded.

They all used a variety of their own techniques. Kakashi, believe it or not, made one clone version of Naruto's Sexy-no-jutsu, with clothes.

"Kakashi, what are you doing?" Maki quickly asked him.

"If the Hokage can't resist it, then neither should these goons," Kakashi said. "Refer to the first graphic novel."

"Okay, but keep in mind, that one was naked," Sakura reminded him.

"Goodness...what did he do?" Maki asked, fearing the answer.

The clone walked out and tapped the shoulder of one of the guards.

"Excuse me, do you know what's going on here? I came to talk to 'the boss'..." she told him.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I don't think that the boss is talkable to..." he muttered, blushing.

"It's top secret information, excruciatingly important," she winked. "Follow me, I'll probably need someone who can fight..."

"Oh, absolutely miss! I could've assumed that there'd be some stuff that not even we know about.

"Well, the truth is..." she was up the stairs and around the hall. "..Sentinel died. While he was on guard, he ventured into the forest and the tree leeches killed him. Vicous. Very violent."

"Oh. I never knew how deadly those things were."

"Your name sir?" she asked him.

"Ramza. Can I trust you to hold a secret?" he quickly asked once he was out of view of everyone else.

"Absolutely. More than you'd think..." she chuckled.

"Me and my friend and considering rebelling against the boss..." he whispered.

"Do you happen to know the boss's name?" she asked him.

"No...I don't really think that anybody does," he raised an eyebrow.

"Wow...well, as long as you're powerful enough, you can join our already assembled rebellion!" she whispered to him.

"How many people do you have?" he asked.

"Seven if I remember correctly..." she thought back. "Can you take me back to the main room? In case you didn't already figure it out, I'm totally against the boss."

"Okay, I have a plan that should get you and the rest of your friends in here safely..." he told her.

--------------------------back downstairs----------------------------------

Ramza yelled, "I've found shinobi of apparent importance to their lands, I want to ask boss what I should do with them...brand every inch of their body until their skin is gone...have them slowly eaten alive by tiger beetles...or have a little 'giraffe surgery'!" Ramza smiled sinisterly.

"You may now pass," the guard examined each of them carefully.

As they walked up the stairs and out of sight, Maki asked, "What on earth is giraffe surgery?"

"Its also called long neck, neck taffy, and just plain old stretcher. Hang you. make sure your neck is dislocated so you just kinda...stretch," he cringed.

"Gee...sounds pleasant..." Maki raised an eyebrow.

As they neared the top story, they saw a devastating sight...the Hokage was lying in a pool of blood with deep gashes on his face and his legs.

"It appears that he bled to death, because I cant see any fatal wounds. He more than likely wasnt able to move after his legs were damaged, and then 'the boss' laid down the final blow to his face," Kakashi closely examined the crime scene.

"Wow. This is pretty bad. Whoever this boss guy is, he must be dangerous!" Kiba sniffed around for a different scent. "Augh!! That scent...smells so much like..." his eyes widened...

And now, back to your Naruto.

"Okay Naruto...I'm about to remove the pole, so sit still!" she fixed her hands around the pole and slowly pulled back. "I'm so sorry!" she said as Naruto screeched like a flock of birds. She pulled the rest out and wrapped the rest of the wound.

"Emi. I'm sorry about everything I put you through," Naruto mumbled.

"What? I don't know what you're talking about.."

"I used you the very first day I met you, I made you get your ass kicked by a nine tailed fox demon, I got you impaled on a signpost, I got you wrapping my wounds, and I got you to mess up your favorite shirt!" Naruto said, slamming his fist onto the ground.

"Naruto!" she hit him in the head again. "Those are the things that make me so in love with you! It's the experiences we share and the things that bring us close together! Those are the things I love you for yourself and the moments we share, not for the things you give me or put me through!"

"Okay, but now we gotta go help those guys!" Naruto tried to stand as best as he could and then fell over onto the curb. "Ouch..."

"Alright, now I'll help you get to the others," she laughed.

What did Kiba smell? Did Naruto fart again? We'll find out!

"I smell something unusual...it doesn't smell like much...but it's very unique."

"What is it?" Hinata asked.

As Kiba opened his mouth, the gang heard a footstep from behind one of the pillars.

"Of course we had to pick a room with pillars..." Kiba growled.

As a shadow emerged from behind one of the pillars, the gang broke out in a fit of laughter so hard that they almost cried.

"What?!" they bad guy asked. He was about as tall as Naruto, and he looked fatter than Konohamaru's Sexy - No Jutsu.

"You look like a 13 year-old!!!!" Yoh laughed.

"You do too!" he mocked.

"So?"

"This is ridiculous, apparently, I don't need my disguise anymore...it's too wimpy looking!" he said crossing his fingers into a sign which was unrecognized by everyone. " Now I can reveal my true form and go all out!" As he did the sign, his skin seemed to grow layer, after layer, after layer. His hair expanded to an extremely long length and his hands seemed to grow longer and more gaunt.

"Now, you shall witness my true power!"

"As if that isn't the most used bad guy statement ever! Come up with something original!" Yoh blurted out.

"You seem to be the big critic, so you shall be silenced first!" (I forgot to mention a few of the characters earlier, so you haven't noticed that they were there. Continue!)

He turned around in a miniature twister of red and appeared right next to Yoh.

"Gak!" Yoh quickly ducked as Boss swung his sword. Unfortunately, (Of course theres a twist to this!) Sakura remained still in fear as the sword dug deep into her chest.

"AAAAAAUUUUUUGGGGHHHHH!!!!!" Sakura sreamed as blood ran down her back.

"?! Did you hear that?! That was a scream!!" Naruto listened carefully.

"Oh no, why us?! Next thing you know, Kakashi's gonna die too!" Emi ran over to the scream.

As Naruto sprinted, he saw Kiba leaning out a window motioning him up there. Naruto and Emi took a great leap up to the window.

"What's...wrong?" he paused as he saw Sakura kneeling down with the sword gleaming with blood.

"Oh heavens..." Emi turned away at the sight.

"Grrr...GRAAHH!!!!" A massive red glow appeared around Naruto as Fangs sprung out from his normal teeth, claws replaced his nails, his hair became a deep orange, and a fire burned in his eyes. He knocked through a section of the wall and entered the room.

"You son of...I'm gonna..." Naruto stammered.

"What, you can't even finish your sentences, boy?" Boss laughed as he took his blade from Sakura's limp body.

"I will dislocate your neck so that you dont feel a thing, rip off your arms and then use then to beat you silly, slowly break each bone in your body and watch your twitching mass of a body slowly die from the lack of ability to breath and blood loss!" he said as he went to Sakura.

"You talk big boy, but I assume you can't do as big as half as you talk!" he retreated from the approaching red glow.

"That is it!! I'm sick and tired of being pushed around, insulted, and bagged on, you are going down!" Naruto Dashed up to him and dug his claws deep into Boss as he replaced his body with a log. Naruto grabbed the newly appeared log and threw it directly at Boss when he reappeared. "Rule number one! Don't reappear in an obvious place like to the right of your assailant!" As the log hit him, Naruto ran up and clenched Boss' neck. "Rule number two! Don't mess with one of my friends!" Naruto swung him around into one of the pillars. "Rule number three! Don't play the game if you can't live to the claim in a room with pillars!" As Boss stared deep into Naruto's eyes, a glare of hatred pierced through his mind.

"Rule number four! Don't play with the Boss if you know it's your loss!" he picked up Naruto by the arms in his hand and as he twisted his arm everyone heard a sickening crack.

As Naruto hung limp from his arms, he was thrown off next to Sakura.

"Two down...seven to go!"

"Naruto?" Sakura whispered without moving.

"Sakura? You're alive?" he whispered back with an intensely quiet voice.

"If you could call it alive...so, what's crackin', other than you of course."

"I'm not out of this fight...but you need some help first!" Naruto got up with his arms hanging down loosely. "Emi! Come here quickly!"

Emi hopped over and asked, "What is it?"

"Bandage Sakura up, she still isn't dead yet, but she will be if we don't do something quickly!" he told her. "Now, where were we? I wont stop fighting until I can't move at all!" he bounced on the ground and popped back in one of his arms, then used that one to relocate the other.

"Ewww!" Emi cringed.

"Okay, while my little freak show of the orange midget, the red little girl are acting around, I'll have to kill someone who'll actually remain dead."

"Naruto, I don't have enough bandages!" Emi quickly looked around for more.

"This is only holding me back...you can use it," he took off the shirt under his orange jacket.

"Lets make this a bit more permanent!" Boss yelled. He went around on of the pillars. "This will be the end...I will win! I can do it..." he mumbled as he appeared in several different places in the room.

"Teheheh...what kind of bad guy stalks around a room, talking to himself in the middle of battle? Hahahaha!" Naruto's red aura disappeared and he started cracking up.

'Hahaha!!! Just what I was waiting for! His red aura has vanished, and now he is at a weak state!' he suddenly appeared behind Naruto. "Hola senorita!" he picked up Naruto and threw him at Emi who was kneeling and bandaging Sakura

"Emi, jump high!" Naruto yelled.

"Huh? Ack!" Out of instinct, Emi rolled, and as Naruto landed on her feet, she shot up upward. "Naruto?! Oops...Heheheheh!"

As he came back down to the ground, the fell with no reactions whatsoever.

"Naruto?" Emi went and rolled him over. As she saw him, his eyes were closed, and his heartbeat was barely there. "Naruto?! NARUTO!!!!" she kicked him as she got up.

Kakashi then poofed over in a small cloud. "Emi...I think he's reacted to the trauma and his body sent himself into a coma to repair any damage inside or out..."

"But Naruto can't be in a coma!! He...he just can't..." she leaned over and gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Now, Boss...I think that it's about time that you got your ass kicked!" She crossed her fingers into a complex sign that Kakashi identified as the sign of Difference. All of a sudden, her body stretched out and she cartwheeled behind a pillar. She began looping around the pillars and she slid down the one right behind Boss.

"Naruto?" Maki went over and checked on him. His finger twisted and his mouth moved in inaudible speech. "Don't worry honey, everything is gonna be -"

"YYEEEAARRGHH!!!!!!!" an arm fell to the ground as the shriek let out.

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Sorry for such a late chapter, I had writers' block...but anyway, who's arm? I guess that this means that whoever is it is un_armed! _HAHA!! That was a stupid joke! Well, every review will decide who's arm it is! So review to view whos arm went shewplop onto the floor. R ASAP D


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